Cake, presents. What's not to love?

Yeah, what's the matter with you?

Don't waste your time, Riley. Been trying

to get Mac to celebrate a birthday since the fifth grade.

No cakes, no piñatas, not even

one tail pinned on one donkey.

Oh, come on, Mac.

- Every donkey needs a tail. - Okay, everyone.

Listen up. You know I love a good party,

but birthdays make no sense.

We are aging every second

of every minute of every day.

And for some reason, we decide to pick one arbitrary day

to celebrate being one year older

all because some pope made a calendar in the 16th century?

If we were on Mars, I would be 14 years old,

and my next birthday wouldn't be for another 231 days.

Mars? You're using

Mars as an argument against birthdays?

Stop playing footsie with me.