Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Eeny, meeny, miny, moe.

Help? Really? What with?

They trashed my place. I'm fucking screwed.

Eight at Sal's place, four at that kid Rasul's.

She lost her mommy and daddy.

I'm Kick-Ass. You mail me?

No, I know, I know. But what if it was my fault?

I don't know, Dad.

Mommy I want a kick-ass Party Dumb Little Fucks

- Why are you dressed as Kick-Ass? - Because I am Kick-Ass.

Yo, listen up. We got five minutes, then I want you back on your posts.

I'd always dreamed of being a superhero, but this was a nightmare.

In the ambulance, they threw my clothes away

I've been trying to figure out how to tell you this.

He has powers far beyond the capabilities of mere earthlings.

Did you watch the TV? The new superhero guy?

and you're already making me miss the hospital.

And the more I found out about his upbringing and stuff, I just...

You inspired me. No Kick-Ass, no Red Mist.

There's a price on our heads, man.

But you know what? I was seriously thinking of mailing his site.

and least yellow custard is not "yoeieueud chdudis." or "yellowlipi cuwwusyxy." or "cleududsysrisu cisuesoodid.". or "yeluwisi cussicoclupeorrgusidisowitard."

I think we'd better invite our Russian over for a friendly chat,

Yeah, everybody's favorite superhero right now, Kick-Ass, right?

And you better start reading the instructions,

Todd, when have you ever kicked anyone's ass?

Well, I wouldn't wanna get in the way of your business, where I'm not wanted.

You don't have to worry about him. You need to watch this.

Let me tell you the problem I got with that, Tre.

You know what my dad really would have wanted?

You seem like a different guy, you know that?

Red Mist! Red Mist!

Yeah. Fuck you very much, Vic. Just do it, okay?

and steals all the coke.

Did you see the clip? He was actually pretty good.

You meant Erika. I know. I knew that.

You keep carrying on like you've been carrying on,

Everything else is in the gray area.

Relax, we're on the same team.

- What do you think? - I don't know, but I think Kick-Ass is cuter.

I thought you meant, like, "How come nobody does it in real life?"

Not anymore. Gigante just put on a little movie-show for us.

Good morning, class.

Can we turn that off now? What's so special about that guy?

Okay. Two more rounds.

And I guess that would have been okay if bad guys were make-believe, too.

You and your crazy midget friend can go bash whoever you want...

- Batman. - I never said Batman!

- Have you seen him? - What happened?

Come on... No, no, no, no, no!

Chris, how long you been there?

Why thousands of people wanna be Paris Hilton

they found you naked.

Yeah, man, come on. I got something I wanna show you.

You know I can't be here. What if somebody saw...

I got to tell you, that hurt.

my life had turned into some fucked-up dream I couldn't wake up from.

It's not all about the money.

What are you gonna do to them?

Yeah, okay, I'm not saying they should do it.

He did very good.

What you mean, like, right now?

Prison was not his natural habitat.

Like when they mix the red one and the blue one.