Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

that I'm now referring to as

I mean, I get this loser talking about the moon

I Mean, Maybe One Day UNICEF Will Get Into The SaaS Business

You win twice brother That’s good biz

That’s you dirt

So, I did a real bad thing there,

It’s a business It ain’t UNICEF okay

How long did you look for me before you gave up?

There. Look. I'm puttin' the lotion on the skin.

We're startin' this Clown.com kind of a thing.

Come on, boy! Come on!

My dad made my last name Dirt for some reason.

It's training.... It ain't Unicef okay?

MAYBE GO DOWN TO MCDONALD’S AND GET YOU A WHAA-BURGER AND SOME FRENCH CRIES!

Thank god for Valerie Marie

All right! We didn't lose him.

- Radio station ID. - Coming to work.

- The one place we didn't look. - I knew you looked for me.

I mean, maybe on day UNICEF will get into the alarm installation busniess Then maybe we can have something to talk about

I was just a little kid.

Enough, you broken record! Okay! I've been down here for two weeks, man.

Maybe one day UNICEF will get into the pre paid wireless business, Until then you gotta go sell people on our value man!

This is a business, not a charity. Maybe one day UNICEF will get into the used grill business... ...but until then, we're the people to see.

But they say Joe Dirts a weird name & how cool am I

I got a backup mic right here.

Watch the guns baby That’s how I get the gals

You like those spinning tires

Everybody know that!

Hey, hey, TV people!

I don't mean to interrupt your clown pitch there,

Do it again, I'll stab you in the face with a soldering iron.

Nobody wants you around PERIOS

Don't forget to wipe your dirt.

You keep calling that tractor rap shit country music. Do it again I'll stab you in the face with a soldering iron.

And If Your Drunk, I'm Not gonna play Spin the Bottle Later either!

When the service truck gets a new helper

It's the wrong tone.

Splitting from the pack on my chopper

Yeah, it is. It came out of the sky.

he’s in dog heaven

He's your real hero, people, not me.

They clean the bowl so you don't have to.

George we'll just chop Marley up and throw her onto a tractor George we'll just knock a bookcase on Marley and chop her up

You are so pathetic.

How my text comes out when typing fast...

Listen. You're on your own.

You see the peanut?

And I wanna ask her why she was playin' these games with you.

We never lost her ..... We was just waitin at the Qmart the whole time!!!

6 7 I just different on the highway

Actually, we got separated when I was eight.

You never give up, man. That's my philosophy.

- Excuse me, sir. - Hey, there, young fella.

Hell, Yeah, I'm Going To Louisiana, Brother!

we might move, and you might not know where to find me.

You don't know how many nights I spent alone staring at that moon

I got to tell her what happened, why I got weird.

- I think your dog's in a little trouble here. - What's wrong?

- No! - Joe! Joe!

This Is A Business, Not A Charity Maybe one day UNICEF will get into the tax business, till then, I’m the guy to see

especially a cool guy like you, Kicking Wing.

- Over here, Mr. Dirt. - Well, it's like this.

If she was here right now, maybe we'd have a house with a little fence

Well, that might be your problem.

Is that right? You think that's queer?

This one time I was jerkin my gerkin

It's Joe Dirt. But if you're just gonna make fun of me, man,

Is this where you wanna be when Jesus comes back

When you find out Lamborghinis cost 100,000 used

This is a business, not a charity Maybe one day UNICEF will get into the chess business.

Now, I'll tell you what I could do.

Home is where you make it!

Are these queer? What's up? What's up?

Over in Kansas.

Fuckin Garden My Ass! God Damn!

THAT’S NOT WHAT I HEARD

Is this heresy? Is this heresy? What’s up?! What’s up?!

Not me! That's the guy!

God I hate these nasty things

I was gonna be a janitor.

This next song goes out to our good friend, Joe Dirt, the dirt man.

Dang. It's out.

Holy shit Fuck you

- You suck! - You do!

We've got the place surrounded. Come out with your hands in the air.

Ma'am, are you selling this car?

People like that security guard,

Hey, man, I... I can't say don't make fun of me,

Whew Look at that shit

I got it. Now what?

I left it here. Friend's house.

Brandy. Brandy is jive.

I'm sorry about the noise, sir.

You're gonna stand there owning a fireworks stand

Is this where you wanna be In 2027?

Yesterday, provide a little backstory for the listeners,

They seem to like me.

and "Life's a garden. Dig it."

Vaya a venderle chorizos a la mona

But that’s a deal though

Yeah, dream on, Kirtboy.

Zander Kelly's on the air.

Joe! Joe! How are you feeling?

They just got their own issues and whatnot.

to do anybody any good with my recollections.

Breakfast of champions.

- Hey, a little help? - There he is, boys! Get him!

You have to hit it with a hammer, but it's a good job.

True Live Resin None of that distillate or added back Terps

and all the while maintained his positive outlook on life,

and it's amazing to me that you turned out like you did

and that means washed under your fingernails and back of your ears

Get this thing full of lighter fluid.

Are you cryin' boy? Notre Dame sucks!!!

None of that pussy skoal

But are you depressed? I mean, your parents, who you were looking for,

I think I'm going to go to the restroom and take a big Joe Don't forget to wipe your Flacco

All right. I want you to settle down. Don't make me call your probie officer here.

I mean, maybe one day unicef will get into the aviation business

It’s not why you like It’s the market

You're my lucky meteor. Right on.

Hey, who's this chick over here? Is that your girlfriend?

I'll hold your half for ya.

Maybe one day unicef will get into the trucking business but until then, axle logistics are the folks to see

My face and your ass. How about that, friend?

It has a happy birthday! Alright, alright. I'm havin' a happy birthday!

These are Roman candles, brother. That's good stuff.

See, them airplanes, they dump their toilets 36,000 feet,

You two shoot him low, you shoot him high.

Corn off the Cob

After watching Tyler Childers music video

Can I say that?

Brandy, what's that got to do with me? We're always gonna be buddies, right?

Don’t make me…

You're my first real friend I've found, outside of Charlie and Brandy.

See, it wasn't really my dog. It was this girl's dog.

I've got to find my parents.

Joe? Joe, come back over here.

They got me on a radio station tellin' my story to everybody.

I just wanna say thanks to all the people that stop me in the street

Maybe one day UNICEF will get into the BOURBON business...

But see, I don't know their last name.

Her legs went on for days.

HOME IS WHERE YOU MAKE IT

Because cory catfish are the only ones I like

- It just does. - It just does.

And it's a good thing that gator didn't get my ring finger,

Show me those boobies

So one night I just pushed him into the wood chipper Told the cops he fell

There's some deals in here.

You're talking to my guy all wrong. It's the wrong tone. do it again, and i'll stab you in the face with a soldering iron

- Good boy. - You got a big family now, Joe Dirt.

How does chiropractic work?? It just does!!!

All right, well, then, thank God for Joe Dirt.

Your buddy Clem's real name was Anthony Benedetti.

So, there I was, right back where I started all those years ago,

Yeah. And besides, she don't wanna see you anyway.

- Hoorah. - What...

No one that cares if you're alive or dead?

Nobody wants you around

See, she signed it right there.

No, man, but you gotta keep going. What am I gonna do, quit?

Henne to Mahomes before his 98yd drive

So, now you have a bunch of names

You like to see homos naked?

You see we're not related. We can have sex again

The little man, the ordinary person who endured enormous adversity,

Time not ber frand

Hey, baby, I'm on! Yeah.