Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

I made a deal with myself.

♪ Hey, sexy stranger, let's go to my place ♪

♪ If he's your broken condom, I'm plan B ♪

I feel kind of bad now.

I'm hanging up now.

We're talking, like, Kabbalah, bee pollen, colonics.

Please, you know what it says.

This essay you wrote at the end of your application, it's...

What's your deal with Rebecca?

♪ I think you'll have to agree ♪

♪ Maybe it's time to grow up ♪

Man, you're like a broken record.

Are you kidding? I would love some poké.

So, anyway, I've decided to eat my feelings, and it turns out...

♪ Se alegran ♪

♪ I'm not the one you adore ♪

Yeah, you know what. Let me make take care of the essay. I got it.

♪ We make quite a pair ♪

What the hell is this?

Are you... are you really doing this?

Yeah! I'll be right back!

♪ Schmoopy pie, I'm begging you, please ♪

Ah, dude, nobody is on LinkedIn.

You can't monopolize the bathroom

♪ And please don't harvest my kidney ♪

So... someone who gets this upset

And feel free to use specific words

This place is the right choice for you.

but every time you show up,

- Okay. - Oh, my gosh.

so I'm going to hit the ladies.

♪ Than I've been... ♪

But then, last night, I sat down and actually read it.

♪ Darling, just settle for me ♪

- No... - No, I know.

to turn over a whole new leaf.

And our employees are just chill.

Who is your favorite president?

Abuela's one is so much better.

Uh... oh, okay.

♪ And please don't be a murderer ♪

Oh, no. it's... it's not him. But it-it's, uh... it's Instagram.

♪ Have... ♪

I make awful decisions.

and not hire this man to hand out leis and sell VCRs?!

Can't you see that?

on a scale from one to ten, rate your suicidal thoughts.

What? What am I doing?

♪ But I'm right here ♪

Uh, we could go, or we could go...

- Thanks. - So, um,

♪ Steppin' in the club, all those eyes on me ♪

Yeah. They asked me if I went to Harvard,