Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Who was that you choked out, man? He had it coming! Who was that?

Fuck! I'll be right back. I gotta go. I'll be right back. Sorry.

You need to let me go and drop all this.

And then we hung out and we watched a movie.

So, where are you from originally?

No, man, I got my... I got my meat in your Q-tip.

I mean, you're obviously good enough to play on the team.

- What? - Like, one of y'all older?

All right, enough is enough. Boys, move in!

Cap, does Schmidt look any different to you?

Fuck high school, right?

Everyone say in the barrio, "Sleepy, he like the Mexican Wolverine" and shit.

It bleeds so much, it's crazy.

What the fuck is going on?

- Schmidt, run! - Get him!

- Okay, okay. - He's clingy.

- They have eight tentacles. - Yes, and...

Same identities.

Okay, so, Yangs, you'll take my dead roommate's spot.

Holy shit, you are looking fit.

- Okay. - You're so selfish.

You can be whatever you want.

What are you talking about? Look around.

Everything we've done and thought has been based on that fact,

"or am I gonna choose a different path and question my convictions?"

Okay, and Brad. Brad could be, like, our guy.

I'm straight outta Compton,

Do you want out? If you want out, just say it.

I know the first time he met you, you dropped a fucking sandwich on his foot

Yeah, yeah, I'll do another.

- Like together? - We don't have to put a label on it.

Can you shut it?

So, I guess you have no interest in having a real job in the future.

Fucking complicated. What is this?

Dude, in Human Sexuality,

"Jesus died for our Sin-thee-uhs

You two sons of bitches are going to college!

I’M LIBERATED!

- Go fuck yourself! - You go fuck yourself.

my name is jeff

When I talk to your parents tonight, I will not tell them about your major.

I don't have any more cameras. I've said it five times.

Your arm all right? You want to take that sleeve off?

This isn't the spring break you imagined?

- Let's blow shit up. - Jump Street style.

I am so sorry for being a homophone.

Did you say the Yangs?

Hey, Maya Angelou.

Yeah, no, we're your 9:00 a.m. That's us.

Okay. What do Lambos have to do with touching children?

That's fucking dangerous!

Wouldn't it be better

You think you’re Deshaun Watson??? Think again...

- Please stay! - I'm flying.

I'll get it off.

It's funny, 'cause he's my brother. So...

I'm sleeping with two of my students. Her and her. I actually am.

It's just, when I'm on the football field and I'm diving for a pass, I feel like I can fly.

That's... Funny, dude. You're funny.

Schmidt, you clearly... Yo, this is the best thing ever!

Rookie fUCKED THE cAPTIAN'S "DAUGHTER"

If you don't have anything to fucking say, open your fucking mouth.

Do you have any idea

What are you talking about? I was fine. I had it.

Hey, you know, we have this rush party at Zeta.

- Doug McQuaid. - No!

I'm gonna do it. I just got to get it at the right angle.

My name if Jeff

I just love when you're sitting there in a room,

Go to the police station,

- Put your guns down! - Fucking guns down!

- I don't know. It's just peaceful. I just like it. - Yeah.

Yeah, man, that'd be sick.

Yo, what the fuck did you just say?

Do the same thing as last time, everyone's happy.

You're making this so uncomfortable.

You looking for some WhyPhy?

It's awesome. You guys want to see it?

I was supposed to go to Berkeley.

What is it? Guns? Drugs?

Exactly like a case we had recently at a high school.

Okay, so no? Dane? All right.

What the hell are we supposed to be buying?

Got a fucking bazooka for an arm. Know what I mean?

Banging bitches and getting wasted all fucking day.

- I didn't do that. - Yeah, I used his and he used mine.

Great, that was great sex. You're good at it.

Hey, Schmidt, look!

- Let go of the fucking keys! - I can't let 'em go.

- My plan is stupid? That's interesting. - What... Okay.

That's exactly the answer I wanted, Mr McQuaid!

Who beats safety Will Glock like an egg white in my famous meringue recipe.

I mean, you are a perfectly good guy. You're very honest and nice.

Maybe we should just investigate different people.

There's no friction with me and Zook. We're the same.

and I was worried that they got the wrong guy for it.

I'm sorry it's not a fucking Lambo. Shut up and get in.

- You're fine. - You're gonna be all right, man.

We're talking missionary.

Hurry up, okay?

Spring break, motherfucker.

No, man, that wasn't Boots! Boots isn't a real name!

- "What am I hearing right now?" - And the psychic told you that?

Look, I apologise about the Zook thing.

- What? - You're not supposed to throw rocks.

What? I thought we had Cate Blanchett.

Begin to be crushed By the trash compactor of sadness.

Maybe he could give you something for your weird old face.

The only way you can fail this class is by not becoming who you truly are.

Oh, my God. Will you please, just for once, just back me up?

- You guys are the improv guys, right? - Yeah.

- I'll take the fucking shot. - Nobody take the shot before me.

- Come on! - Do it!