Health Inspector 2000 - Get a Life [S02E04]

Sir, I have never in my entire life had any action, nor will I ever have any action.

And how are you this fine morning?

Okay, stop shouting at me.

Oh, you big baby, you can hardly taste it.

You'd be putting me in an awkward position.

See this imported silk shirt?

Sorry.

My name's Chris Peterson, Americano.

And that somebody might just be me.

My advice would be to kill yourself.

It's so sick.

Well, he's not my attorney.

Or I could make a couple of phone calls.

You stinking, lousy, squealing, ungrateful, two-faced, double-crossing Judas!

It can also land you in prison.

I know what you're into.

Conditioner.

What is that?

Hey, Rob, no hard feelings, huh?

Those people should be called food, uh, inspectors.

Rush, rush, rush.

What did I tell you about screaming like a girl?

You know, sometimes when the light hits one of those Conair hair dryers just right, they look like a snub-nosed 37 with pearl handle and mahogany trim.

Do you think he likes me?

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