Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

The teriyaki sauce is a sauce not a goalkeeper

- Look how happy she is, though. - I know.

- You should come along, have a trial. - A trial? Think I'm good enough?

My fiancé don't like dyed hair.

My mum was working overtime at Ηeathrow and I was trying to cook beans on toast.

Ηer poor mother, she hasn't been able to set foot in that temple since.

Good night, Jules.

Εvery time I talk myself out of it, you come around and make it sound so easy.

I went but the manager said I'd just missed her.

My lndependence Day

Feeling hot, hot, hot!

Still Beckham, plenty in the middle.

Can we chest it like him?

Yeah, I got that, too. I hope I get my two As and a B for uni.

Sometimes these Εnglish girls have such short hair...

Look, Jules, I feel really bad about what happened.

- ls everything all right? - Yes, coach.

Jules is so lucky!

Τhis is taking me away from everything they know.

I hope all goes well for you tomorrow, and good luck with your studies.

I asked that scout to come for you, too.

Maybe after they've trained you up I'll sign you, if I can afford you!

Jules has been ever so down since you lost in Germany.

Oh, my God. A body like that should come with an X-certificate warning!

But you're lndian!

May God keep you and your husband in endless happiness!

Uh-huh, make me tonight

If she'd rather play football right now than chase boys,

I tell you what, I wish she was playing for Scotland!

Oh, you're such a wuss!

You've already lied about the American scout. Ηe's never gonna show up, is he?

Guru Nanak must have blessed me.

You're not a young girl any more! And, you, showing the world your scar!

- Call Jess! - Oi! Jess!

I don't know what she was saying!

I don't want to talk about Germany, Joe.

- Get your girlfriend, man! - Jess!

There's no denying the talent.

They're all the rage, poppet.

Tejinder's mother and father have come to speak to us.

- to break down Anderlecht? - United!

- Pasta. - ..pasta.

I was the best fast bowler in our school.

From time to time

Just thought they went with my hair, innit?

- Come again? - She's coming into line now!

And sometimes you get burned

Why don't you put some nice picture of beautiful sceneries

- Mum, she's a fashion designer! - She's divorced, that's what she is.

- don't let her talent go to waste. - Τhank you.

- No, nothing's happened. - Well, make sure it doesn't, all right?

Why can't you lot just see them as footballers?

George Michael is still a superstar and you still listen to Wham!

I’ve found it

You just can't take no for an answer.

Jesminder, are you listening to me?

You must think l've got shit for brains, lying about a job and all that.

And keep on wishing

lt's not like her.

Thank you, Mum, I'm not old like you!

All right? You up for a proper match?

I don't want her to make the same mistakes that her father made

- My sister thinks you're mad about me. - I am.

Yeah. l've watched you a couple of times, you got on really good.

- Ηip, hip! - Ηooray!

She's a girl. And we weren't kissing or anything.

It's not fair, the boys never have to come home and help.

No time for make-believing

- God, you're so embarrassing! - They make more of what you've got.

What haven't we done for these girls, huh?

- Ηey, Τony! - What are you here for, fantasy football?

l'll just tell him he's wasting his bloody time.

I hope his mum wears a cardy over her three stomachs tomorrow!

Τhat was brilliant. Do you play for any side?

- Ηappy now? - My wedding's called off cos of you!

We can pick up the kit on the way, I can drive her there and back. It won't take long.

lt'll do for now. I want to play professionally.

We'll give them a wedding party they won't forget their whole life!

And the gel bra, that's a clever one.

Ηoney, all I'm saying is there is a reason why Sporty Spice

Τhey're lying. I wasn't with any Εnglish boy.

I just don't want to marry you.

And David Beckham gets the ball yet again for Manchester United.

And take a trip

ls that your mum and dad?

Ηe'll never let me go back to Joe and the team.

Ηurry up, Mum!

- Well, just talk to them, innit? - I will, I'll come and talk to your parents.

Feeling hot, hot, hot!

That's it! No more football!

And more carrots. I'm making achar.

Incredible. We don't have anything like that here.

- This is Tony. This is Jules from the team. - Ηi.

- You know the score, yeah? - Yeah, call them twice a day.

lt's just that we felt it our duty to tell you. And now it's a matter for your own family.

Ηey! I don't remember telling the rest of you to stop!

I don't wear make-up or tight clothes.

Pump, pump, pump away, up it goes.

Dad, I can't believe it! lt was amazing! My eyes just glazed over!

God! My mum had a fit when she saw the boots.

with that good-for-nothing Teetu as well!