Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Aah!
A vampire, madam. Yes.
[SYNTHESIZER PLAYS LONG NOTE]
I live in the light, Barnabas.
Then be fascinated, Julia.
Not that I can think of.
Exactly what I've been saying. This family could use some balls.
Curses us.
Come on.
But even in my wildest dreams, I never thought I'd feel as happy as I do now.
- Thank you for having us. - Evening.
He's a fine lad.
Come on. I know you're here.
All I need will be mine if you are here
Balls are how the ruling class remain the ruling class.
Sleeping flame, I summon thee
- Nothing to see here. COP: Let's move.
Who Was the kid?
Thank heaven.
You should've loved me, Barnabas.
I see.
You never wanted my love.
Have you any experience with hypnotism, Barnabas?
Lying and stealing blood are things you're rather familiar with.
Call and arrange a meeting.
And I give you my word of honor:
You don't have to be nice to him just because he's nuts, you know.
[HAMMER POUNDING]
Fine.
Yes...
I've come to realize shutting you in that box for all eternity...
Oh, I think you know who.
In your own crazy and miserable way, you fought on...
Josette.
Mommy! Daddy!
JULIA: You're a liar.
Excuse me.
Hello. My name is Maggie Ev...
Barnabas?
No more Mr. Nice Guy
He's got the ear of every captain from Bar Harbor to Boston.
In fact, you would rather sell your soul to Satan...
Welcome to Collinwood.
...you must have started as the most beautiful creature that has ever lived.
...here.
See you in a couple centuries, lover boy.
She's only 4 years old
And they all considered it worth the sacrifice, I assure you.
Five more minutes.
...my beloved Josette wandered helplessly towards Widow's Hill...
BARNABAS [ON RECORDING] Yes, I killed Dr. Hoffman...
I'm sorry.
Tell you the truth, I think they're a little spooked about what happened last night.
Please, call me Vicky.
That's where I keep my macramé.
WILLIE: All right! I heard you the first 20 times.
JOSHUA: Come, my love. Let's go.
Doesn't mean anything?
Wha...?
I can explain.
Between you and his mother, I can hardly get him to talk about anything else.
How could you tell? These are exact replicas.
[SINGING] I was gone for 14 days
...your perfect Collins pedigree lacked a bit of substance...
Barnabas? Dr. Julia Hoffman.
[BELL RINGING]
Hm. I was just looking for the, uh...
I could've been gone for more
Please, I'm begging you! Please, don't!
[DONOVAN'S SEASON OF THE WITCH PLAYING OVER SPEAKER]
You live in the shadows.
Oh, by letting a vampire use one of the guest bedrooms?
And if you have an ounce of love or respect for this family...
Perhaps only a few brief decades this time.
[MAKES KISSING NOISE]
Lo! Above the gates of hell...
Or you leave...
Someone offers me a piece of gum Me everytime:
What on earth are you talking about?
...and when his parents were killed, he went mad.
...but you would be hearing a lie.
...and kiss it repeatedly!