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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
I don't know. It's not like you've ever treated women in such a way...
♪ She's exaggerating ♪
[Shivering] Ted, I'm desperate.
and you're naked in front of Shaker Heights High School in a play you never rehearsed for.
Now it's as rude and expensive as San Francisco.
And she just happened to be a leather cuff saleswoman.
♪ ♪ [Ends]
Congratulations! You're marrying my sister!
but my body is detoxing after years of one-night stands.
I say again, am I right?
Uh, yeah. Yeah, that'll go great with my cucumber-jalapeño egg cream.
- would be a total... - Disaster.
My panties may or may not be on when you get there.
You give yourself room to grow.
[Ted Narrating] Then, later, at a club in Chinatown...
Hey, hold on. That slut just got here. How'd she get beer already?
Now get back in there before all your teeth fall out...
Ted, I beg of you. Don't quit on a body that won't quit.
It's about the 20-year-old, Ted.
♪ ♪ [Ominous Theme]
On my way here, a taxi jumped the curb and it pinned this old lady.
♪ You're so beautiful ♪
Then you probably shouldn't scroll to the next picture.
with a passage from Ted's dream journal.
- Oh. Hmm. - ♪♪ [Light Theme Continues]
[Lily Moans]