Phoebe Buffay

How come?

Oh, as opposed to your other multifunctional nipples?

I might have.

Why couldn't you just have figured this out six years ago?

...to look nice for your gay husband.

What have I not told you?

I don't understand. I don't understand. How can you be straight?

Well, is she the first that you've been with?

Okay, I wasn't in love with him. I was just helping out a friend.

...and you throw such great Academy Award parties.

Okay.

He was just a friend, and he's gay...

I mean, you're so smart and funny...

I don't know what to say.

No, no. That's all right. Don't tell me.

So, um... So, what's up? You came to see me yesterday.

My brother's straight, so...

Seriously.

...do you think I would have been the one who?

For your information, I'm going to see him so I can put all those feelings behind me.

- Her name's Debra. - Oh.

You know what? I just have one more question. Um...

I don't think either answer would make me feel better. Here.

...and wake up with a woman next to me.

Sure.