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A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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All those other guys' fights.

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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Take the other side. There you go.

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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I went to your farm the other day,

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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But if we really do love each other,

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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my girlfriend and I are enjoying each other's company.

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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It looks like our shadows are about to kiss each other.

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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We barely know each other, but, hey, when it's right, it's right, huh?

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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The creams, the waxes, the lotions.

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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The owner of the Moustachery.

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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The longer the ride, the lonelier a man gets.

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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and the diseases, and the wild animals, and the Indians,

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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The Black Shit. The Black Shit.

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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Say the word, the word "moustache"

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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the deadliest gunman on the frontier.

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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What the...

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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The latest offering in the frontier's disease-of-the-month club.

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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That's the jackpot. That's the jackpot! Huh?

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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To capture the hearts of the fair

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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Ben, check the outhouse. Lewis, the shed.

A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)

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We are the guardians of the future.