You say anything about that and I'll do you for treason.

M'lud if we could continue...

He's got a Chinese bit there.

No, that's contempt of court.

- It was only a joke. - Contempt of court.

However, I'm not going to punish you because we're so short of judges at the moment,

what with all of them emigrating to South Africa.

I'm going tomorrow; I've got my ticket.

Get out there and get some decent sentencing done.

Ooh, England makes you sick.

Best I can manage here is life imprisonment.

It's hardly worth coming in in the morning.

Now, South Africa? You've got your cat of nine tails, you've got four death sentences a week,

you've got cheap drinks, slave labour and a booming stock market.

I'm off, I tell you.

Yes, I'm up to here with probation and bleeding psychiatric reports.

That's it, I'm off. That's it. Right.

But I'm going to have one final fling before I leave,

so I sentence you to be burnt to the stake.

Blimey! I didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition.