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Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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So, I was in New York,

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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and I told him I was having suicidal thoughts,

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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'Cause I thought it was a sandwich.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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as brave when I was your age.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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and I was out of commission for hours.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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Here's what happened. I was in New York.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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- that I am not... - and I'm everything my mother said I was.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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but I was looking to relocate to Los Angeles

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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I was busting your balls 'cause you lied to me.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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I dated him for two months when I was 16 at a summer camp.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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but in that moment, it was like everyone was my mom.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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Your Aunt Nancy was apoplectic.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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And-and I know that it was, like, a bummer my mom didn't show,

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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What was the name of it?

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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That's crazy. He was just here.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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Like glitter was exploding inside me.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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No idea. He said he was going out,

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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and that was probably a very uncomfortable experience.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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I-I can't. I think I might faint.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015) - S01E01 Josh Just Happens to Live Here!

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♪ Than the middle school's music program was cut ♪