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A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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in Al Funcoot's new play.

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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when you become the exciting new face

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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Spend some time with your new father.

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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Dr. Montgomery's supposed to be their new guardian.

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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I'm just glad the Baudelaires are adjusting to their new life.

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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There's talent scouts in the audience looking for new actresses about your age.

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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Oh, on the contrary, I'll have my new secretary give you a ride home

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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It begins before the children meet Justice Strauss,

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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From the beginning of this miserable tale to the last melancholy scene,

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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did not begin in the private, somewhat ill-decorated office of Mr. Poe

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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In fact, the tale of the Baudelaire orphans begins long before the fire

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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Their story begins before their brief and unpleasant stay with the Poe family.

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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Nor does their story begin on this gray and cloudy morning at Briny Beach,

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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Jacquelyn, could you bring the Baudelaire file in here, please?

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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Hello, my name is Lemony Snicket,

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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and I'm sorry to say that the alleged entertainment you are watching

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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is extremely unpleasant.

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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Jacquelyn, could you bring the Baudelaire file in here, please?

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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I cannot think of a single line, a single word,

A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning 2 - S01E02

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that does not chill me to my deepest bones.