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The Invention of Lying (2009)

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Did you buy new clothes?

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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Uh, he's a new type of ethnicity.

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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Did you invent a new kind of bike?

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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Today, people are saying he has new information

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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Today, people are saying he has new information

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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Okay. I'll be searching for new jobs on Craigslist.

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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Nothing new is gonna have happened in the 1300s.

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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so there's nothing new I can tell you about that.

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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In Rome, Italy, they wait. In New York City, they wait.

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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and there was a bear, and...

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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Now I'm obviously rich and successful and...

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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and successful and famous changed your genetics,

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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They feasted and danced and laughed, and it was a joyous occasion.

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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and my little apartment and just kind of hang out by myself and drink and watch TV.

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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As you can see, people have jobs and cars and houses and families,

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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I've been busy with work and things and...

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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And she's right.

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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And I lean over and just turn it off.

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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And if we were to get together and procreate,

The Invention of Lying (2009)

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and a lifetime of financial stability and physical security.