Now, I have here a mascot selection sheet.

Nowadays, everyone wants to change mascots and flags

Attention students, we have tallied your mascot nomination sheets,

Get, get outta here, PETA! We're changin' the mascot already!

Let's bring out our mascot and get this pep rally going!

And the most popular selection will be the school's new mascot.

It was ridiculous. We have to have a new school mascot

the mascots on this election sheet, and instead write in "Turd Sandwich. "

Jimmy, we're gonna have everyone write in a mascot that's really funny,

Buh, Mr. Garrision, if we change our mascot that means the eco-terrorists win!

by eco-terrorists for the 47th time, we are going to change our school mascot.

You think the school mascot should be a turd sandwich? Well you're not exactly Einstein!

We were just wondering who you might be voting for, for the school's new mascot.

Every student is supposed to check the box next to the mascot they like the most.

Now children, it's not that bad. There's plenty of great new mascots on the sheet to chose from.

You don't care?! You really want a turd sandwich as your school mascot?! On your football helmets?! A turd?!

A turd sandwich is not only the first turd to be nominated school mascot, but even the first, sandwich.

We are People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals! We protest your insensitive use of cows as your school mascot!

Goddamnit PETAns piss me off! We're never gonna end up with a stupid eagle or a faggy bobcat as a mascot.

That"s a... fantastic idea fellas. Uh, the key to successful humor is s- staying power. Uh tell me the first mascot idea.