Finally I want to thank God,

What is it ? Who wrote it ?

- It's kind of private, - It's about Michael !

- It was you. - It wasn't me, I swear.

To Oscar Martinez, It's the Show Me The Money award !

That's the type of song we're gonna play to the ladies, Hit it Dwight !

- Hey ! You know cool it guys ! - You suck man ! You suck !

It is the whitest sneakers award, because she always has the whitest tennis shoes on !

No, no ‘cause the ice melts, and then it's like second drink !

but you have to stare at it because your boss is making you.

This is the part where Kevin stands in front of the camcorder all night. It's great.

Having a bathroom is a privilege, it is called a ladies-room for a reason,

Ok, first off, my Keds, because I couldn't have done it without them, thank you.

You know what they say about a car wreck where it's so awful you can't look away ?

Let's give Michael a round of applause for MC-ing tonight because this is a lot harder than it looks,

Ryan the temp !

But what the hell everybody ?

So you're ready for the Dundies ?

So what's the joke ? You're not perfect either !

The Dundies are like a car wreck that you want to look away