Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Okay. Fine.
Get in there.
I walked by you and I heard you going on about your Christmas plans...
That could be oregano.
False alarm.
It's important, you know?
Because you're acting like a weird pebble.
I want it to be you.
TMZ will love that shit.
- Who's Tommy Owens? - He's the best player in the league.
And easy. My God, dude!
What guy?
She Home Alone'd me!
- You're naughty. - I'm very naughty.
You ever see The Shining?
- ...I wreck myself? - Ugh.
- Should we do it? - Yeah, do it.
We did not do that!
...with a soothing body high...
♪ But each and every year We bust Christmas carols ♪
Nobody touch nothing.
I look funny?
I should just drop a deuce in my shorts.
Shit. Are you going to the Nutcracker Ball?
You need to fucking check yourself before...
Newsflash: Everybody's on steroids!
- Gosh, I am such a fucking piece of shit. - No, you're not at all.
♪ As I proceed to get wreck On your stereo ♪
- Any guys? - Me?
- I'm looking for my buddy Ethan. - Oh, shit.
- I know... - No!
♪ To have the blues ♪
That was there before.
Because I put cocaine blood into her fucking drink.
♪ Now I'm busting raps While switching cross-faders ♪
♪ Baby, please come home ♪
True.
Wait, I'm sorry. We're not getting married? This is a no?
Yeah, no!
♪ And a partridge in a pear tree ♪
There she is! There she is!
♪ Not an imitator Just a crowd motivator ♪
- Excuse me. - Ethan said. And she turned with a fright.
You don't need to know.
What? You gotta propose.
They worked up the courage, proceeded to call.
School's far. Your mom lives close.
That was fucking touching, yo.
Is it just me? He's changed a little bit, right?
- Ooh! Your bedroom. - Shut up.
No girlfriend, no money.
Do I look weird now?
Still weird.
DJ Kevy Kev!
I'm an orthopedic surgeon.
I thought, Wow, that's pretty fucking cool.
What's everyone doing?
Your friends, they ain't gonna leave you.
You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna use Find My iPhone and find the phone.
Who's the baddest motherfucker on Christmas day?
At least I'm doing something with my life.
It's so cold outside too.
This is...
With so many drugs, I can't believe I survived.
- Now, I'm going to teach her a lesson. - Okay.
I did it.
yes really
My name's Joshua. I'm gonna be your Red Bull-provided driver for the evening.
This is a costume!
Fuck that park. It got crackheads.
- She stole my fucking weed. - Ha-ha-ha.
Oh, fuck.
Merry Christmas.
♪ Rice and stuffing Macaroni and cheese ♪
♪ Bells will be ringing ♪
Fuck!
You're making me a little uncomfortable.
I end every Christmas at this party.
Don't put it there, Isaac. Okay.
Come on, man.
Okay.
It's amazing. You've had the season of a lifetime. Congratulations, man.
- Take your piece-of-shit phone back. - It's the same phone.
Give me some, Ma.
...that we should not be having this baby!
- Isaac? - Fuck. Yeah.
Old people have so much stuff. You guys remember that.
Come on!
Of course it'll work!
Are you hungry? I can heat up some food.
This guy's a grower and a shower.
Yeah, sure, yeah. Yeah!
This guy's a jock.
You shut up! You're ruining my trip!
This is the thing I didn't expect. To fucking like you, dude.
I knew it! She fucking took my weed!
I wanna grow up with you.
That shit was the weirdest fucking experience of my life, dude.
But you know what?
I really love you.
...but there's a whole history here that he's brushing over.
Me, I don't have time for kids.
It's amazing.
Oh, my God! This is the greatest night of our lives!
- It's fine. I love you so much. Okay? - I love you too.
Bye-bye.
Yes! You look weird!
Ethan, it's Diana!
Nobody touch shit.
I'm gonna keep being honest.
So this is it, Diana.
Dude, you make music that people have never heard.
- Hurry up. - You guys know this can't possibly work.
- Your vagina. Woopidy-woopidy. - The biggest! I know.
You got beat up?
This is the best.
♪ Nobody ought to be Alone on Christmas ♪
Have fun.
Congratulations!
All of a sudden I was just thinking about everything you've been saying...
I love you too. Merry Christmas.
Now it's Christmas. It's not Christmas till we eat egg drop soup.
♪ All I wanted Was to break your walls ♪
A very nice, eloquent man named James is sending me his penis.
Yeah!
She was rummaging through my jacket when I was hitting her from the back.
You hear me, young lady? Pop your pussy!
- Yo, carpet match the drapes? - Yeah, I got a big bush.
- Luckiest guy in the Park. - I sure am. Bye.
No, Ethan, I'm not going to marry you.
♪ There is a reason ♪
And the whole time, I wanna see that elf face.
Those guys don't need me anymore.
Thank you for my friends and their families.
Sweetheart, they're gonna clean that up.
Wait, look!
May I take your coats, gentlemen?
That’s ok
Oh, God. Are you one of those guys that are always making up excuses?
- Your phone's in midtown. It's all good. - Ha-ha!
For a Christmas present tonight, I'm gonna take him under my wing.
Anyway, that'll be a hundred bucks.
That's why we got them mixed up.
- Oh, no. - What?
What? Maybe I'm high or something, man, I don't...
Folks out at the church would love to see you. Aunt would too.
Sure, hold my cane for a second.
- Hi. - What's up?
♪ I'm addicted like a stoag Not into vogue ♪
Man, you're everywhere tonight.
♪ Merry Christmas And Happy New Year ♪♪
It rips you up. If you see me naked, it'll blow your mind.
It's hot in here. I run hot.
♪ Now, I'm a take a try And get a piece of the pie ♪
♪ Are ringing a song ♪
...is this party called?
...so I didn't wanna meet your family...