Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

-would you do it too? -Mother, I wanna see the world.

and suddenly, I wanted to play the piano again.

Except for the good guys, like me, who always bet on ja--

and I hated it, 'cause learnin' sucks.

-Uh-huh. -Jeez, are you even listening?

Anyway, I needed some advice,

No, we're okay, President Roosevelt.

[poignant music playing]

Why don't you go home and crawl up in your mama's panties?

Is that good? Is that what you guys wanted me to say?

Boy, do I love trains.

It didn't win the Oscar, but it lives on in our hearts.

Learning about your life was actually really interesting.

-for pussy? -Is that so bad?

I'm sorry, everybody.

She's practically begging you to pull your taffy.

That was the night that changed my life.

Duke! Duke! Duke!

I stayed up all night creating my masterpiece.

So then don't be ashamed of where you come from,

I lost a pediatrician that day.

My Woodrow's about to Wilson.

As someone who's dated a woman of color - uh, Missy -

You think you some sort of gangster now?

Edward, that is the corniest line I ever heard.

[a cappella jazz group harmonizing]

Holy shit. Did you lose your virginity to Harriet Tubman?

The place was dark and dangerous.

-[sniffles] -Maurice, why are you sad?

Hey, boy, get back to steerage where you belong.

-What is that voice? -Nick, it is truly cringe-worthy

How do I make girls melt like that?

Pianist... penis, vagina... Hold on!

Mr. Brooks, would you teach me everything you know?

Thank you? That's code for "Please, sir, bust me the fuck wide open."

Ragtime. Hah! I'm so proud of you.

-[Duke's mom] Dinner's ready! -I--

Ah, thanks, Nick. I can't wait

Everyone at church is gonna be jealous.

and don't be afraid of where you're going.