Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

- Fucking shit. Why did you do that? - Yeah, I hit a fire hydrant on purpose.
# Thank you, Lord # # Thank you, Lord #
Gentlemen, start your engines.
# And things change #
Can't shake. I've just got... deer head all over me.
No. This is typical government bullshit, sir. I...
- Jesus, Kumar. - Oh, I hate you so much!
Speaking of ex-girlfriends...
Texas rn
the first thing you have to do when you get to America...
Illegal immigrants arriving at Gitmo
Well, I hope you're ready for me, Tits...
# And I think to myself #
Hello, ba...
it's fucking disaster after fucking disaster.
Hey, honey. What's up?
Count of three?
# Your dick went straight to DVD #
Hold your horses, peckerwood.
If you like weed so much, why don't you just legalize it?
- What about you? - Me? I've been in the spirit.
All right. Well, that makes you a fucking hypocriticizer too.
...going? - Come on.
- and open your mouths. - Please, Big Bob.
- Amsterdam? - Yeah.
Hebe!
- But I like it! - Yeah!
Remember that? Before you fucked it up? You remember that?
Whose side are you on? I thought I told you to stay in the cockpit!
# My stoney #
Great.
- Oh, God! - Oh, my God, dude!
OK. This isn't creepy.
Why the hell is your ass so dirty? Don't you wipe?
Why don't you just kick our ass instead?
I'm a pretty good translator.
It's going to be a perfect day.
This is just a poem for my creative writing class.
What the nigger was that!!??
Run, run, run. Run, run.
# All I want is smoke weed and praise God, yeah #
# I got you pussy-whooped #
- Neil! Neil! - Come on, come on, come on!
in-room films or a magazine.
Don’t ask questions You don’t want the answer to, buddy
Colton! Colton Graham can help us out.
Holy shit.
All right, let 'em in.
Bang bang, Roldy.
Actually, it's Brooks Brothers.
Tell me you didn't eat that cockmeat sandwich.
No. We're not... here to complain about the noise.
- He's just an idiot. - This is just a bong.
You act like I've never smuggled a fugitive across state lines before.
But they... It's not even clear that they should have been there in the first place.
- Sounds like a plan. - Let's do it.
when you know it could ruin my political career?
- Bye. - Bye.
- You wanna pause it? - I'm gonna go to the bathroom.
There's no way I'm letting you see me in that light. Good luck with your calculus.
Jesus, dude. Here, you really need a hit of this.
Did you go?
OK, first of all, that was Goldstein's idea...
# My stoney baby #
You must have woke him up. He was supposed to be asleep. I'm sorry.
Fellas, this is my wife Raylene.
# Only church I know is Snoop Dogg's studio #
Right. Listen...
Yeah, I guess they are.
getting plowed by a bunch of European dudes.
Guy crashed into a bunch of wine bottles.
That's what Trump thinks of the constitution.
but the other night, I ended up at that Asian party...
That's what I think of the 9th Amendment.
You want to follow me?
Dude, you took Neil's Mace?
That's only the finest.
- Hi. - Hi. You look good.
# Yes #
I already told you that they took off runnin'!
Nail on the head.
but I'm pleading the Fifth until I speak to my lawyer.
# But since I met you, baby #
It must have been either al-Qaeda or North Korea who broke 'em up.
No, common mistake. Poon handler.
What's a cockmeat sandwich?
- You just make yourselves at home. - Thank you.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Sorry for the inconvenience, sir.
So this has nothing to do with my ethnicity?
Good enough for me.
Look, I know, I'm sorry. I hate it when people disturb me here too.
When we get out of this I'm gonna fucking kick your fucking ass, man!
Fuck! How do we get there? We can't go to the airport. They're looking for us.
Driving a yellow convertible with the top down, dressed like assholes!
What?
Fucking assholes.
But I'm pretty sure he said something about going on the offensive.
They were both born and raised in New Jersey.
# I wanna smoke some weed and roll me a J #
This is what I think of your disciplinary
Well, wait till you see what they make you eat in here.
Hey! Hey.
- You all right? - Not really.
Well, I figure we're gonna land somewhere around Miami, right?
I wish you'd-a told me you was bringing guests home.
- Put it away. - No, dude.