Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

- Fine. You convinced me. You're nothing. - I'm nothing.

I just had the weirdest flash of a whole life,

"Robredo's chief speech writer, is both intense and boyishly handsome."

You know, I originally wrote,

Do you know what you want yet?

- Hey, Will, man, Happy New Year. - Hey, yeah, you, too.

Okay? It's two months in New York. I'll be back before you know it.

I want to talk to you about your birthday. Call me.

"The evenings are hot and sticky.

I'm so glad it's you.

- I'm a William. - Don't interrupt.

You're the toilet paper guy.

They still haven't come up with one yet, but I'm sure they're working on it.

- Oh, sorry. No, go. - What?

Actually, he was completely alone and it was hours before the janitor found him.

And then the inevitable moment, and I don't know why it...

Iran-Contra. Arms for oil, no problem.

I thought you were gone through the summer.

He died three weeks later in a car accident.

Oh, these are the ones I found that have inscriptions.

I'll keep that in mind.

- This just came for you. - Thanks.

- How's it going? - Still got a lot to do.

Besides, we have a plan, right?

Look it! You got a tear right there! I see it.

I can be happy for you. Of course I can be happy for you.

Thank you. Yes.

What happens if they give him one of the hard words, like "truth"?

You could do anything on earth, and you work in a bookstore.

the campaign manager would realize how brilliant I was.

But I didn't mean to tell you that.

- I walked away, Will! From Paco! - Good move.

What am I supposed to do now?

Now, that's how important the work is.

Bitches They can kiss my ass

But you didn't change April's name. Why?

- What do you get, Hampton? - Yeah.

I always think of something more important to do.

- I think you should go, Will. - April?

see if we can use the Internet connection and find a printer.

- Dating? - Not at present. You?

- Yep, nice to meet you. - Yeah, it was great meeting you, too.

Well, if you look on the back, they all have one common song, which is...

Wisconsin! Yes, the Cheese State.

- Penis! Penis. - Okay. All right, that's enough.

These are for you.

...you realized Mom was the only one for you!

But I wasn't the only one with problems.

Who cares about Chicago?

- Taxi! - Taxi!

Yeah. I'm her daddy.

"Emily is sweet

Did you ever think

Just want to let everyone know that the new signs are ready.

- I know. - I really thought

I'd just really like you to be happy for me.

If you hand this in, we won't survive it.

Come on through. You can do it.

Or foursome if that old dude is still in the picture.

You're killing me.

Check that they have legal representation, okay?

...which he doesn't notice 'cause, of course, his hands are all over my body,

And for a long time, nothing seemed to matter.

- You slept with my roommate. - Oh!

It's her first night out since the baby was born.

Good evening, gentlemen. Pack of Reds, please.

Because the first time that I saw these hands,

I know I'll never find it.

"and we decided to take all that love

Come on, sweetheart, give me a smile. I've waited my whole life to do that joke.

- Sounds like a great mom. - She is a great mom.

It is complicated, isn't it?

What do you mean?

It seems to be about 300 pages or so.

- We'll see how this goes, okay? - Gareth.

to the home of his ex-girlfriend, Summer Hartley,

Well, because now that you're getting divorced,

Those were delightful, weren't they? Sorry about that.

That's my Yarnie, my Yarnie

That is an impressive mental leap, Russ,

- Hey. - Hey, is that the toilet paper guy?

Hello. - Hey. Hi.

I need to know.

Go to rehab or life rehab or something like that.

Mom, can Dad come with us to the zoo?

- What, is that gonna matter to her? - Yeah, it does. Hi.

- You look great. - Thank you. You, too.

I never told anybody to lie.

"and begin their treacherous journey towards the fallopian tubes!

- What about Mom? - Well, I started dating again.

- It's amazing how you do that. - What?

So go back to Madison.

You wanted to be President?

That I'm gonna tell you this story and it's gonna make everything better?

That's good because it's ironic.

- Why? - A whole bunch of these.

...25, 26, 27... ...25, 26, 27...

- I should go to "life rehab"? - Yeah.

I mean, to please a woman like you, it would obviously take a...

You missed your birthday cake.

She's starring in somebody else's diary now.

I can't believe you smoked and were such a slut.

He's a putz. This is exactly what my book is about.

In fact, I know so much, I could bring you both down.

And the real story, not the, "Oh, we met, we fell in love,

- Hey, how are you? - Nice to meet you. We're walking, Hayes.

and then I'd be coming up with strategy, and before long...