Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

- I've finished it. - Oh, the book?

Uh-huh. Well, let me tell you, if he'd been that concerned about me,

I blame British Telecom. All this new technology...

♪ But I've been wrong before ♪♪

I am trying to be your girlfriend, Gerry!

I'm here, Gerry, if you need to talk to me about anything.

to a life of terminal monogamy.

Only please let me finish before you say anything, OK?

Your mother's showing some signs of improvement this morning.

- What is he? - A wanker.

You went back to America, remember? I couldn't afford the bus fares.

It also helps if people mind their own business and leave you alone. Sorry.

Wear something warm on Saturday. It can get cold on the river.

have been cut down with food poisoning after eating your sandwiches.

So how come last night was the first night you didn't ask

♪ It's not so bad ♪ ♪ Bad, bad, bad, bad ♪

Thank you. You're a genius. I'm ecstatic!

♪ Have fun living in the city ♪

I came back, though.

and I'll help you.

After that, if I've got any energy left, I give me boyfriend a blowjob.

Helen, please, look at me.

Bollocks to him. Bollocks to him. Bollocks to him.

But wasn't there was some brandy and two glasses on the dressing table?

Lydia might be pregnant.

♪ Want to thank you ♪

♪ Put your picture on my wall ♪

I don't know. Can I answer questions in seventies pop music?

They only come out for special dinners. You know that.

♪ Got out of bed at all ♪

♪ And, oh ♪

I'm afraid she's lost her baby.

For God's sake!

They're passed into the foetus along with all the amniotic stuff.

you're really nice and funny. My friend Anna thinks you're cute.

By far and away, the best thing. I mean, she knows that.

I didn't want to just presume that we'd...

♪ To what I want to see ♪

♪ I'm on my way ♪

in Lady-shagging-Godiva!

I told you before I cannot leave Helen for... for... for...

Now I want James to call, Gerry calls.

- Do you love him? - No. I could never love a Baywatch fan.

Sometimes we are plonked into people's lives

He has. I've got to work.

- I fainted at work the other night. - Sweetheart, are you OK?

But you couldn't end it with Lydia 'cause you weren't sure how she'd take it.

I am standing on the platform at Limbo Central

with my heart and soul packed in my suitcase

Well, you know, at my old company,

- Are you all right? - Yeah... no, I'm fine, darling.

And then follow. Follow.

I mean, that's... that's not a small thing.

But the flashing red light way of telling you're not over someone

No reply... Perfect.

Oh, this is terrific stuff.

A mate of Russell's works at the restaurant.

- Hello? - I really need to talk to you.

Thanks for listening. I'm really proud of you.

You know, night, moon, boat, water lapping.

- I can't hear you. - 'Can you hear me? '

I come home and catch you up to your nuts

- My office is just around the corner. - I know. Um...

Gerry, how did one of my Waterford crystal brandy glasses

'This morning was sensational.'

Cheer up. You know what the Monty Python boys say.

Oh, went to Anna's? Boy, you're a one-man SAS crack unit.

I know. Sorry. I wasn't thinking. I just want to show you something.

God, you're always at the library.

And I wouldn't mind betting you're talking to yourself in the mirror again.

Gerry, I really have to go back inside.

You're still counting how long you've been apart in days, hours and minutes.

Two of your most disgustingly large Grolsches, please,

Come on, you. Let's get you home.

♪ Hey, look at me... ♪♪