Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

[Mattel CEO] Beautiful countryside.

I love women. I want to help women.

-Can you get me a coffee? -No.

I understand. I set myself up for that.

But what did you say?

-Geez. -I know.

♪ I get up out of bed and wave to my homegirls ♪

It's... [screams] Oh.

All right. So...

and just generally not turn into Weird Barbie?

could I just run to the restroom

but I thought we could go get some soft serve.

Do you guys ever think about dying?

-Barbie doesn't get embarrassed. -I know.

I always thought this would be our house. [chuckles]

Barbie! Take your lady fashions with you.

In our assessment, money is not speech,

Don't look at me!

[President Barbie] Can you start the movie over

♪ I'm always number two ♪

-[audience Ken] Ken! - [applause]

I think we're good, right?

[pensive music playing]

Geez, you would think a construction site at lunch time

Incoming brewski beer. [mimics airplane]

Mmm. Babe, listen.

Well, I am technically Stereotypical Barbie.

[all applauding]

-Sure. I don't have anything big planned. -[grunts softly] Yes.

To be honest, when I found out customer lifecycle wasn't about horses i lost interest

I did write a book.

-You did so well. -You still hurt?

C is for construction site

[groans] It's time.

Or not a mom who's also not president.

Octobre 2, 2015

You guys are the best. Thank you. Thank you.

Couple of blondes, answering to Barbie and Ken.

THE LAST ONE. THE EASY ONE.

I can't. I gotta go.

No! No, no, no. No. Okay. Yeah.

Oh, what do you got?

as life-size versions of themselves...

Wait until you see the boat.

[gasps] You're malfunctioning.

[Ken] ...and your Ice Capades Pretty Practice Suit

are interfering with your dollness.

that separates our world from theirs

And we can restore everything in Barbie Land

-["Angel" playing] -♪ Johnny, my baby, did it always have to end this way? ♪

For you see, if you do not find her and fix things,

Let's go get my doll.

♪ When the night's here I don't do tears ♪

Sims anytime B Co speaks

I don't deserve this.

♪ Dance the night away ♪

We were only fighting because we didn't know who we were.

Playing with me?

♪ I'm read' to go You know, you know ♪

No! I got into this business

It's basically, like, being a human person all the time--

[all whispering]

By giving voice to the cognitive dissonance required

You have to say you want to be healthy,

but Ken only has a great day if Barbie looks at him.

They really helped each other.

♪ You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere ♪

-Can I go that way? -Yes. Okay.

[sighs] If this got out

who owe their wonderful lives to Barbie.

-[needle scratches record] -[music, chatter halt]

[narrator] ...nobody bothers to walk them down the stairs

[narrator] When you're playing with Barbies...

I'm the mother of a son.

Who is playing with me?

♪ I could dance, I could dance I could dance ♪

♪ Pink just looks so good on us ♪

Oh, my God. I had a Weird Barbie.

The Nobel Prize in horses goes to...

I'm not Adventure Barbie. I'm Stereotypical Barbie.

[Sam Smith] ♪ You think That women rule the world♪

Does that make sense?

I love the elbow pads.

Yes, and you wanna know why? Because I never get to do anything.

[laughs] Looks like this beach was a little too much beach for you, Ken.

-Fine. Can you be speedy about it? -Mmm-hmm.

Or you're gonna keep going funny. Look at your upper thigh.

I didn't even go on that cruise I won at your school raffle

♪ Pink just looks so good on us ♪

♪ Baby, treat me right♪

-["Speed Drive" resumes playing] -♪ Oh, oh ♪

-No. Please get out. -I can't.

No. Barbie's not a bimbo.

[chuckling] Yes!

It's useless trying to deprogram her.

both behind her back and also to her face.

I just wish someone could come with me, but you can't.

♪ Somewhere else there is to see ♪

But you don't even know how to beach yourself off.

[Ken] I'm not getting any of that.

-I love fringe. -I love denim.

-Who are you? -We're Mattel.

[Ken chuckles nervously]

Welcome to my Weirdhouse.

-Hi, Ken. -Hi, Ken.

♪ I get up out of bed and wave to my homegirls ♪

-Anyway, I believe in you. -Thank you.

[elevator dings]

No, no, no! This isn't the answer.

[President Barbie] Ahh!

It's gonna break my spirit.

She wears sweatpants all day and night.

-Just go! -I can't.

Yeah. Buckle up, babe. [chuckles]

Sexualized capitalism, unrealistic physical ideals...

Any power you have must be masked under a giggle.

♪ I don't know how to feel ♪

[Sasha's mom whispers] Okay, duck.

since the first little girl ever existed,

Let me show you.

You're not your house, you're not your mink.

-Ken. -[sobbing and muttering]

but then i realized horses are just men extenders

where I was somehow really invested

feeling kinda good about herself.

You have to never get old,

and I don't think I'm really good at anything else.

You're back. She's back.

My tiny head is just swimming

-Really? -Whoa.

-Oh, my God! -And Cellulite!

Hello? Are you two, like, shining?

-We are gonna make a lot of money. -We are officially important.

[breathing heavily]

Does that make me a woman?

Sorry, no, do you know what time it is?

[gasps] Get in the car!

[Kens] ♪ Baby ♪

[sniffling] It's just Barbie.

Okay. Whew! Let's do this.

And the Nobel Prize for Literature

And it is not lifeguard, which is a common misconception.