Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

That's where you're wrong.

No, l-I just thought I'd ask bluntly in case it was the right question

Wandsworth. The dodgy end.

All I want for Christmas

And particularly enjoy the incredible crassness

It's all for you, sir

But I will be very sorry

Or I could give you 5% of the profits.

I'll see you later, all right?

(Russian) Is this the way to the train station?

Am I sad or not sad? I think you’re not surprised.

My cabinet are absolute crap. We hope to do better next year.

I know. I'll name one of the characters after you.

three days and, I suppose, what, two hours?

No. I'll just be hanging around the mistletoe, hoping to be kissed.

to get the Pope on the phone tonight but...

Well, this is a surprise.

- Well, you know... - We always tell your secretary

(Bernie) Mine first. Mine.

or if, worst of all, it's a necklace and love?

And may all of your Christmases come true

She's not here - she's at work. I'll take you.

Just never been able to tie a girl down.

Come on... Let's get pissed and watch porn

Yep, solid gold shit maestro!

I can't break this spell

Me After SigniNg Up For How to get rich in 10 days

(Darlene Love: All Alone On Christmas)

No! Absolutely not. We didn't and do not consult on that either

ever so coolly,

Do you have a favorite lettuce? Do you want some....water?

Said love wasn't worth the pain

Did you see those pipes?

You're the one girl in town I'd marry

And even if she did, she'd despise me.

And a letter box

And still somehow

I hate Vladimir Putin

Certainly. Excellent. Will do.

(Natalie) 'Dear sir, Dear David,

(Portuguese) I will miss you.

I hate Uncle jamie

why don't you come back and sleep at our place?

'We're live across the nation and you're number one.

Hold tight, everybody.

The problem is his mum always used to talk to him, you know, and...

Father is about to sell Aurelia as a slave to this Englishman.

Which is what? Turkish?

20 years ago, you'd have been his type.

Erm, it was, erm...

Yes. Pathetic, isn't it?

Or give me 50% of the profits.

- Er, bonjour, Aurelia. - Bonjour.

- Did I mention that I love you? - Yes, you did. Get out, loser.

- 'Do you trust me? ' - 'I trust you.'

When she first mentioned what's about to happen,

'Let's hope it's the latter. Here it is. Number one, from Billy Mack,

'This must be very exciting for you, fighting for the Christmas number one.

And you're all I see

for her hands in marriage.

I am here to ask your daughter

Make your heart believe a lie

She's got me but I'm not free so...

No way. Anyway, they fly tonight.

Either that or gay as a picnic basket.

You've made the April I lead Foolish, too

I'm rambling now, sorry.

Where do the Ionely hearts go...

I've looked at love

But I've never seen him before.

It's Christmas.

switch off your phone and tell me exactly how long it is that you've been working here.

'AII right, open your eyes.'

Oh, where the fuck is my fucking coat?

Those young popsters come Christmas will be stretched out naked

with a chubby employee. (Snorts)

I Know My Heart I Know My Heart Can Make You Happy

They've declared their marriage by the giving of rings.

then casually mention you'd like to marry him and have lots of sex and babies.

I'd get a girlfriend there instantly. What do you think?

Ooh, would we call her chubby?

I had a real search when you first called and couldn't find it so...

Like the desert

Like a light bulb

(Portuguese) What kind of book is it?

just always given him the boring biscuits with no chocolate.

redistribute her?

Oh, Jesus, not that crap again!

Have you gone completely insane?

You're not actually going ahead with this stupid plan?

God only knows what I'd be without you

I feel it in my fingers I feel it in my toes

There's just one thing I need

- Fool! - Get off, you big bully.

- Jeannie. - He's from England.

You're so excited I can feel you getting hotter

- Yeah. - Uh-huh. Good, good.

Just one dance?

- I'm always... - (Juliet) 'Mark? '

oh god, she's in and now she'll think i'm a total spaz if i don't go in, too

No, absolutely not! We did not and do not consult on that either!

on my friend Mike's show in a few minutes' time.

you can just write on it.

you never talk to me.

I thought if I was in the band and played superbly,

Come on, Mikey, you know as well as I do the record's crap.

- The final flourish. - Can I pay?

Yes, I have, Ant or Dec.

- What's that? - A cinnamon stick, sir.

(Chattering excitedly)

Where no one's ever gone before

- Just give me one sec. - Yeah.

...this one. - I have bought the traditional scarf as well

You will know the difference when...

Me the beginning of the episode

Are you gonna dip it in yogurt? Cover it with chocolate buttons?

Sell? Who said sell? I'll pay him.

- It's the Chancellor on the other line. - It isn't!

Cool. Powerful.