Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

track you down like dogs,
Don't aggravate the old witch. I wish I was a witch.
Well, it's nice to see you too. All right. Let's go see ma.
- Don't make eye contact. - He's turning around.
I just called the bus station. There's a road to the South open that's going to Philly.
- Gag her. - You're doing me a goddamn favor!
Stop the madness! All right, all right, all right.
You don't understand. You can't go home. [SIREN WAILING]
Yeah, nothin's changed, huh, Dave?
Look, can I ask you a question?
Shut up!
Looks like they got company with them in that jeep.
I detect resistance.
E-E-Ed, swallow that.
[APPROACHING FOOTSTEPS]
Edna? Edna?!? Are we sleeping together? I think not! You idiots!
Oh, come on. Now, would I do that to you? Dave...
[SPLASHING]
Does that look familiar?
[DAVE] What's that?
- Hold on, Alvin! - [WHIMPERING]
I told them there was a sniper on the roof.
[SIGHS]
Ohh... mentally retarded.
What do you know? You slept through the whole thing.
[SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE]
You two are on parole. You cannot leave the state. You are in my custody.
We gotta have a serious talk! Now get me the hell outta here! Uh-oh.
Well, according to the post, they may be home for the holidays.
Hmm.
No? [CHUCKLES] No what? What are you talking about?
♪ but remember the Red River Calley ♪
I knew you'd react like that. That's why I got another copy for your future perusal.
What?
Yeah. I have the same thing in my wallet.
How? Clovis! They're bullshitting you!
- [ALVIN] Go! - Alvin, do you know what you're doing?
Everybody, nothin's gonna happen. Keep your hands up and relax.
- You going South? - Nope.
We were out here skiing, and the back of it-- Oh, man!
Is he retarded? Yeah.
You remember? Yeah.
And gotcha! [NERVOUS CHUCKLING] I'm coming, I'm coming.
and that something bad is gonna happen as a result of this transgression.
Going home to your fammily? No, just my mother actually.
Aw, baloney. Are you sayin' that stuff was stolen?
Vic, we put the money back.
Mix the two together? No, the Brandy's for me.
[DAVE] The town bank.
huh? What? What?
[CHUCKLES] Ma.
♪ down through the chimney with good Saint Nick ♪
I'm just real lucky you're going the same way as me.
oh!
Well, I guess I got nothing to hide now, so--
Bas ab bohot gya Mujhse nahi hoga iit
Forget what? I got eyes. I know you. Forget it.
I show them a picture of ma, and they start shooting at me.
You got-- no? All right. Raise your hands.
There's a man in the water. [COUGHING]
Just put the ball away for now. Thank you.
Come here! Come on! Come on!
When you're upstairs, you're up. And--
Thank you. Thank you.
No, ma. Dave and Alvin would never steal anything.
Alvin Firpo. You have been labeled a kleptomaniac.
Come on. There.
It wasn't your fault. It was my fault, ma. I-- I convinced Bill...
Oh, well, you're a priest. Yeah.
You are not thinking clearly. No, I'm thinking very clearly.
A sleigh? Catch the sleigh!
[WHINNIES]
And as far as periods go, oh, it was a mother.
Flying would be out of the question, especially in this weather.
Please-- please, I can't-- [CASH DRAWER OPENS]
Shit!
[SPUTTERS]
I just met this really terrific woman.
Timmy!
[DAVE CHATTERING]
No choice. But he resisted, every step of the way.
Huh? That's my bus.
He said it's time to forgive.
[OVERLAPPING CHATTER] Vic?
[WHINNIES] [ALVIN] You stay there, Merlin. Stay there.
♪ [CONTINUES, INDISTINCT]
I wanted to say my appreciation for your hospitableness.
Are you coming along with us? No, no, no. Not you two.
Where were you five hours ago?
What are you watchin', Marla?
Run! Run, Merlin! Run!
You're surrounded by 10 men. Helps to relax you.
We can solve this between us.
I apologize for my brother. He's uhh... Mentally Retarded
[SCATTERED RESPONSES] Merry Christmas. The snow came down pretty fast.
[DAVE] And out.
When I go to a friend’s house for the first time and try to be polite Can you.. would you please pass the uh... giblet gravy?
Good evening. May I assist you with your specials tonight? Yes, waiter.