Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

[gasps] oh, jesus.
At the free clinic or suffer.
But no one wants to sit with me at lunch.
- No, thank you. Doctors are crooks,
I don't know how it happened.
He's a deacon at first baptist.
Didn't sleep well. - Take a nap later.
Which the law doesn't even allow, I might add,
Where are you going? I'm still talking!
All: Oh, no.
[cell phone ringing]
No 200-seat lectures taught by t.A.S.
- No, no, no.
I asked for a bone-dry cappuccino.
He's just mad 'cause somebody cut off the tip of his penis
Nothing?
Setting the house on fire.
In 250 words about my most significant challenge in life.
- She wrote the wongs and told them to take hymie away.
- Saw you on the news, frank.
I'm sorry you had to deal with that.
Your dad beats the shit out of us,
- Hey, frank, how do you fit three homos on a barstool?
- You've got my attention, mister--
On her facebook page?
[phone ringing]
Margie never labels them because everyone
Why aren't you at school? Are you sick?
And stayed... I'd forgive her.
- Thank you so much.
But it wasn't her time of the month.
You think I don't see? I see.
- I have no fucking idea.
We're grabbing dinner tomorrow night.
She almost had a cardiac episode she was so upset.
- I'm not following.
- It's nothing.
You should un-friend her.
- I just don't want to do the gimp thing.
♪
Applied to colleges for me without asking me.
As a woman who would abandon her children.
- Hi, this is fiona from worldwide cup.
- We are not the kind of people you can push around
- Some of the office bitches may have narc-ed on you
- I am not a faggot.
- What's this? - Payday.
Come on, I can't be late today.
- Why not?
A few personal calls on company time--
Maybe cut off a couple earlobes?
- So, uh, I'm the fluffer and they're the happy ending?
And you give him free refills.
Yeah, I could be down for that.
- And the gay world responded with chocolate and cheese.
- What reason, that you're an idiot?
You stick to the script. - I got it.
Fiona said you guys were gonna watch liam today?
- I'm so sorry. Please don't fire me.
You know, they happen when
- You wish. - Are you really gay now, frank?
Every time he dropped off a package.
I am not allowed to share in his insurance benefits.
- Oh, jeez.
- Hey, you got an extra one of those?
[cheers and applause]
That is no reason to deny me my basic civil rights.
- No, you're--[clears throat] sorry.
- Oh, you think I should have wrote it myself?
You'll help me maintain that reputation as a hard-ass.
Which means for me, it's stand in the line
See, friends of mine are trying for a baby.
You cook for me, clean for me, shop for me.
[rock music]
♪
Are you skipping school because of me?
♪ did you think I'd crumble?
- Yeah, hi. Yes. Fiona gallagher.