Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

You know, I'm very jealous

Now, I am told it's because men are threatened

"She doesn't give a fuck about what I do 'cause she's chill."

SEMEN CUM PENIS COCK ASSHOLE TITIES BOOBS PUSSY SEMEN CUM PENIS COCK ASSHOLE TITIES BOOBS JUNK NIGGER PUSSY ASSHOLE ASSHOLES AND DICKS FUCK ME SHIT FAGGOT NIGGER!!!!!

When I saw that in my underwear, when I saw those loogies,

…while this grown-ass man is straddling your rib cage,

Any man watching me, listening to what I have to say,

But Barbara is a woman,

And then it turned out that my colon was perfectly healthy,

…that your toddler threw on the floor…

"Oh my goodness,

[applause and cheers continue]

and you see him from this very unflattering angle

And then they become obsessed with dried jujubes

I think that what happened was, at the time,

of wanting to fool around outside of your marriage,

"Oh, you don't talk to me like that."

That wasn't passed down to you from your mother.

is frightening.

You sit there at the most crucial time of the day,

how do you feel about your wife Ali going up on stage

where not to put it, how fast, how slow,

-♪ If you trust me -♪ Do it ♪

It's all because of fan pussy.

So if you haven't seen the movie, it's a romantic comedy…

and then it's an emergency.

I like Fabuloso, okay?

[growling, grumbling]

It's highly unlikely that any man in here…

Fan pussy is a great reward for doing stand-up comedy.

there is no word for a male mistress.

because it runs in my family.

so you might as well pick the bitch that will give you health insurance, okay?

My husband and I are the same age.

Has your sperm swam in the eyes of an icon?

-Merona, whatever's on sale. -[women laughing]

…that I'm a real piece of shit, okay?

I'd be like, "What the fuck am I doing?"

And that, single people,

this important woman could be doing with her valuable time…

I was like, "Oh my God, I still got it! I still got it! I still got it!"

[crowd laughing]

I want to be part of your Telemundo, okay?

It's so annoying.

And then she turns to me and says,

I got both of those things.

You're too scared to ask your wife for alone time,

at the most inconvenient time of the day.

Only other married people with kids can empathize