Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

and I've decided to make you official security supervisor of the branch.

What does that mean to a United States law enforcement officer?

that involves suspicion or testing of any kind.

We just need urine, sir.

Do you want to give Michael your urine?

A cup could find its way under the urine. It might be an accident.

This year more people will use cocaine than will read a book to their children.

When you tell Jason you have loaded the van.

"I can test anyone randomly, and I have chosen you randomly." "That's not random." Okay, eeny, meenie, miney, moe, is random.

Well, you have, because being a narc

No…It’s Tenacious D

Oh, hey, Stanley. I was just doing an impression.

No, just... Is something wrong?

And you all failed. Miserably.

When you sign your job application,

When my friend asks me to give him a ride back to compton late at night

Two nights ago, I went to an Alicia Keys concert

i cant wait to jim i swallow

But you know what?

Thank you, Michael.

What I tell myself when I drink wine during Hell Week... It’s for the antioxidants

Good. Thank you, Michael.

One of those people will be dead from drug use

I did not become a Lackawanna County volunteer sheriff's deputy to make friends. And by the way, I haven't.

We test a lot of urine.

Do you think it's possible that maybe you could have had some drugs

I don't think Michael's ever done drugs. I don't know if anyone's ever offered him any.

But that's illegal.

For the antioxidants

I did not become a Lackawanna County volunteer sheriff's deputy to make friends. And by the way, I haven't.