Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

You have to be on a deserted crossroads after dark.

(TENSE MUSIC PLAYING)

We'll follow that light.

(HONEST JOHN SCATTING)

You'll learn all about it in school.

He said I didn't belong. All the kids laughed at me.

(SINGING) It's only peer pressure Unless you're not a peer

Fuck you Jiminy! Pinocchio, if you don't shut the fuck up I'll have to punch you in the fathead.

(AUDIENCE EXCLAIMING)

But did you know, many people say that you're not actually real

A living puppet without strings!

(MONSTRO GRUNTING)

It goes around the Earth once a day. It's basic, simple science.

Attaboy, Pinoke. Now you're cooking. Let's get out of here.

Who needs an education

Maybe it is time for you to go to school.

No request is too extreme

if I hadn't gotten into the conscience business.

Well, I don't know about that, Pinocchio. I mean, look at all this junk.

The problem with that one clock, it talks too much.

You see that key hanging on the wall?

-(GASPS) -(AUDIENCE EXCLAIMING)

LAMPWICK: Conscience, right.

It seems Pinocchio is serious about becoming brave, truthful and unselfish.

I mean, that is, if Pinocchio here was a real boy.

-Hey! This is more like it. -(BLUE FAIRY CHUCKLES)

Well, I wouldn't want that on my conscience.

Whatever it takes

Where do you suppose all the kids went, Lampy?

Yep, donkey ears and all.

(ENCHANTING INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)

We'll be one big happy...

We must have music.

"Mastro Geppetto. Wood-carver, fabricator of clocks, toys, oddments."

"To feeling how I felt when he was here with me"

Ah, there we are.

They just don't understand, do they, Cleo? My clocks, they mean everything to me.

And despite a few minor blended family issues...

Now we can go home again and we'll be all together.

Hey mullet head let us out Aw don't worry girls I've prepared a front row seat for you

-(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING) -(CREATURES GROWLING)

Yes, yes, we're all together again. Isn't it wonderful?

What the cuss is that all about?

-(BRAYING) -(CREATURE GROWLING)

Wait. No. I'm coming to you.

They're both gone.

Jiminy. Father. Help! Help!

PINOCCHIO: How do I do that?

Of course, this never would've happened

Ah! And here are your new schoolmates, and, ah, Signora Vitelli. Buongiorno.

Actually, it's a story that begins once upon a time, a long time ago.

Figaro, you're here, too. And Cleo.

(FIREWORKS SHOOTING)

Like a bolt out of the blue

Not ríðikœľusü pųpeís. Pųpeís bíłøŋğ îñ þe pųpei şo.

(RINGING STOPS)

Well, I'll be. He's asleep.

Oh, who cares what he thinks? His pedagogy is completely outdated.

Father, wake up.

Hey. What's the big idea? Get me out of here!

-(SIGHS) Okay, you have a point. -BLUE FAIRY: Here's the thing.

-That's me. -(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)

Last night, the Carabinieri arrested Stromboli and put him in jail!

-Jiminy Cricket, temporary conscience? -Well, then, I want to go to school.

Thanks, Pinoke. Now, swing me towards the lock.

An almost real boy!

Last night, the Carabinieri arrested Stromboli and put him in jail.

(CLOCKS RINGING)

And he listened to his conscience.

Father? Father, talk to me. Say something.

(WATER BUBBLES)

(MYSTICAL NOTES PLAYING)

-(DRUM ROLL PLAYING) -The toy who thinks he's a boy.

And what did the wise and learned schoolmaster say?

I wasn't even angry anymore! Wah-ha-ha-ho-ho-ho! I was supposed to be a real boy la la la la la la la la lunch and la worry and we are!

The sweet fulfillment of

Tomorrow we have a big show in Siena.

An actor's life is gay

(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

-A tiny boat? -Yes, a dinghy.

(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

I'm a cricket. More of an insect than an instinct.

Anybody, please! Just call anybody! Help me, please.

You're wrong, Lampy. I still call what you did cheating.

(JOYFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

Better yet, have two. Bottoms up!

You went to school. You gave it the old college try.

and the greatest theatrical maestro on the face of the earth...

(MYSTICAL MUSIC PLAYING)

They're around here somewhere. What do you care?

But old Jiminy picked up the fumble and it's smooth sailing from here.

(CHUCKLES) My name is Pinocchio.

Hey! Don't call me Mister Dog you fucking jew!

Makes no difference who you are

-I know I can talk. And so can you. -"I know I can talk. And so can you."

-Whoa! -(MEOWING)

(SCHOOL BELL DINGING)