Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

I guess I get inside, hit these air conditioners. I get a little dizzy.

There is no such thing as only anymore. Not now, not in Saigon.

- How the hell you find us, Sparky? - Your jeep.

Whoa, there, Dick, put the brakes on.

First thing I'd like to know is what subject this is.

Your friend is next.

We're trying to meet them, but nobody can come up with any good lines.

[IN NORMAL VOICE] What is this demilitarised zone?

Oh, Mr. Cronauer, we say thank you for your fine teaching about softball.

So without further ado, here's a farewell extravaganza.

sir, in my heart I know I'm punny

[WOMAN SCREAMS]

- Programming taste. - Programming taste.

and should describe the contents of your duffel.

You don't really need me You just keep me steaming on

SOLDIERS: All right!

[SCREAMS THEN SPEAKS GI BBERISH]

[HUMS THE TWILIGHT ZONE THEME SONG]

And then try and take her into a bed.

Stevie Brass in WNSK Radio! PREPARE TO POLKA, KIDS!!!

I'm certain that I'm a Catholic boy, and I don't know when I'll be getting laid.

General likes easy listening. I have to inform you...

He's left Crete. He's entered the demilitarised zone.

I'm... She's getting away. Edward, get the jeep, get the jeep.

Greetings and salutations to any and all servicemen in the area

I guess that beach movie really impressed her, huh?

I know Americans.

Wait a minute, try this one, try this one.

Would you kindly lower your tone, please?

Adrian Cronauer, Gls, a wacky and welcome addition...

- Get a job. - Get a job, again.

They spilled something on your pants, what would you do?

Bob likes a big room, sir.

Also Elizab... Queen Elizabeth, Liz...

[SINGING BEACH BLANKET BINGO]

Sir? Do you see anything on this profile indicating an officer?

- Where do you imagine you're going? - Just gonna get a little something to eat.

DREIWITZ: Please welcome to the microphone, the lieutenant of laughs,

But I warn you, you not like it when you get there.

And don't say that the weather is the same all the time here,

Yes, come, we go.

[I GET AROUND PLAYING ON RADIO]

[IN NORMAL VOICE] Hi. What's your name?

when i get to work

You're not gonna continue this broadcast, are you, sir?

For those of you recovering from a hangover, that's gonna sound just right.

(Inaudible dialogue) ♪ I see skies of blue ♪ (Inaudible dialogue) ♪ I see skies of blue ♪

Yeah, now, then you say, Groovy, yeah.

Well, wait till you hear it. He's this far from sincerity.

How I’m feeling today

Oh, no, follow the Ho Chi Minh Trail. Follow the Ho Chi Minh Trail.

There it is, man, yo!

- I can't, I gotta be back on the air... - You have to meet her today.

The weather forecast on Radio Studio West

I'm interested in the girl, not in you playing Dear Abby.

Pick them up by their ears, it doesn't hurt them as much.

These three were executed shortly after this photo was taken.

I've been on a Greek island with women who look like Zorba.

Patrick O'Ma... O'Malley.

will resume as scheduled at the Ban Mi Thout Park,

Military intelligence? There's a contradiction in terms.

Okay, sir, thank you.

Stamp collections, pulling chickweed from my dad's dichondra plants.

(Inaudible dialogue) ♪ The dark sacred night ♪ (Inaudible dialogue) ♪ The dark sacred night ♪

He was quoted as saying,

That's wonderful.

[SOLDIER] I'm with somebody. Don't come bother me right now.

[HELICOPTER WHIRRING IN DISTANCE]

If someone in America comes up and says,

[MIMICS TELETYPE MACHINE]

The Mississippi River broke through a protective dike today.

LEVITAN [ON RADIO]: This is AFRS, Radio Saigon.

He's not out till you have both halves of the ball.

and some sort of social infection that doesn't go away.

A woman by the river going,

Not official news. Far as I'm concerned, it didn't happen.

if you're going to be dressing in civilian clothes, don't forget pumps.

Sir! Sir, we have to get some dignity here.

[AS MICK JAGGER] All right.

I don't think you understand me, Sparky. Ahem.

[NORMAL] Tell me what it feels like. [SOLDIER] Fool, it's hot.

Коли в вас на роботі завал а ти запізнився на 2 години

[AS ELMER FUDD] Thank you, America. It was fun being president.

Oh, she pour nuoc mam noodle soup with fish ball.

to make every effort to dry them out in the sun before requesting new ones.

- Really? - Yeah.

I don't know what to say.

You know, he's really funny. You know, he's like a Marx brother.

That's pretty much to the point, sir. Not much grey area in this one.

Dammit Marty! This will not look good on a resumé!

[WOMAN, SCRAT, AND SQUIRRELS SCREAMING]

- I know it sounds dumb. - I not can do this, Cronauer.

Reinstate the man.

- Specific introductions.

[AS FRENCHY] Oh, Lieutenant Steve.

My boyfriend's back and there's gonna be trouble.

And my older brother, who be 29 years old, he dead.

I got something I gotta do.

[SLOWLY] I heard that.

Everybody say gook, but it's all right.

- Give me your hand. - Thank you.

who's in charge of orientation and billeting of enlisted personnel

From England, today, Princess Margaret threw a shoe.

United States Air Force. The hat does give you away.

Well, then I guess that would make you an Eydie Gorme.

I got people stuck in places they haven't even considered how to get out of yet.

I damn near busted a gut laughing at him. And the troops, they love him.

You're a very attractive man, Abersold. Don't think I haven't noticed.

- And you have to get on the air. - Oh.

Not enough for the car, yeah.

[DREIWITZ AS HAUK] And if you do...

I'm gonna give you the old chuck on the shoulder now.

- Three, four. - The left, left, left, right, right, right.

Hey, we got a great show coming your way today.

We have to go to Washington to Weather Central to Walter Cronkite.

I work for a living, airman.

Good Morning Roz!

So many things not happen the way you want them.

- Where's that? - The noodles, remember?

SLOAN: Last time, in our last class, we read Chapter 3.

- I hope... - You shut your fucking hole.

Hello, Vietnam, and greetings.

Slip me some skin, don't be afraid.

[SLOWLY] We found out that we can't find them. They're out there,

straight to hell

A little dignity!

Moving on, moving on into the dawn with the dawn-busters, yeah.

- Mr. Cronauer, I must... - Oh, Minh, not now.

Sergeant major.

Oh, sir, Walter Cronkite lives in New Jersey.

- You gotta tell me where your brother is. - I don't know.