Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Yeah. I mean, you said there are advantages to being single.

You gotta let go of the past, and Mikey, when you do

You look like shit.

The beautiful babies don't work midnights to 6:00 on Wednesday.

Oh, Mike, you gotta stop worrying about this. We're goin' to Vegas, man.

We're gonna go home, gonna play with Daddy.

Dude, it’s fucking on!

Mickey? Mickey's an icon.

Yeah, against the computer with the offsides off.

There's, you know, no clocks in this town anywhere.

Jesus Christ. Pause the game.

Will you stop for a second?

Oh, Mike. Respect, my ass.

The honey baby's bringing us a cocktail.

All right, man.

- Here it comes. - 'Cause I'm tall.

You eat anything today?

- Mikey! What's up, man? - You wanna play again, motherfucker?

Yeah, for the same reason that you miss her.

Vegas, B-Day. Vegas.

How can you even compare the two, man?

sitting there, drinking orange juice, feeling sorry for yourself.

You're like a big bear, man.

You live in this fucking fantasy world.

You didn't go to college. You don't know how it is.

I look up, everyone rips up in applause.

Why do you think they put the instant replay in the fucking game?

Yeah, I really didn't like her that much, to be honest.

I shouldn't. It's a weeknight.

I just wanted you to know that.

You know what, man, you were fuckin' off your ass tonight.

This just isn't working out.

But the truth of the matter was, you saw my picture, you saw my tape.

Baby, we're gonna get laid.

Selling scrap metal.

The Age of Enlightenment

- Dude, it's so fuckin' on, dude. - I know. It's on.

Must've been a while ago, 'cause I'm...

I still haven't told them I didn't get the series.

Because you know why? Because you make it happen on the bets.

Hey, how's it goin'? What's up?

- I'm gonna get you that scotch. - You know, forget about it.

What'd you think of that Dorothy girl?

Well, yeah, but how long was the relationship she was rebounding from?

You figure they'd figure it out by now, right?

I didn't see Trent Walker come in here."

None of this shit anymore.

B, that’s who! B is the big winner!

- This is the skank shift. - Look at all the beautiful honeys here.

Party, buddy! Yeah! Dig that!

- You're money. - Come here a second. Listen to me.

Listen. I just listened to you. Now hear me out.

Oh, they're gonna notice me and you, 'cause they're watching

Yeah. Listen, I don't think that's going to be happening just yet.

And it says here, "Breakfast anytime."

- Yeah, I swear to God. Swear to God. - Wow.

You're so... you're so scoundrel, and you don't even know it.

Pause the game!

Whatever, man! You're like a fuckin' little whiny bitch, man.

"You shouldn't leave without getting something for free."

- You're fuckin' hurting feelings here. - Hey, it's on. It's on.

How was it hard?

So I felt confident, 'cause I gave a good read.

Unbelievable, dude.

- I'm the one who should be sorry. - Baby, don't talk that way.

Some don't like me. I don't like certain people.

And no matter how hard I try, I won't...

and there's all these little kids sitting in the waiting room with me.

You always double down on an 11

- Fifteen. - I don't know what to do here.

Then this cigarette has your name written all over it…

And the funny thing is...

Listen, why don't you come out tonight, Mikey?

- Wow. - That's your great bit.

I could've been out with Sue one night drinking

Dude, I'm about to do my thing with the thing.

Why do you have to make a major production every time we go out and embarrass me?

You didn't have to get into it, baby.

You been tearing yourself up about this girl for six months.

When are we going to Vegas? - We're going tonight

- Oh, so you want something. - Hey, fucker. Hey.

except they're surrounded by a bunch of drunken, horny assholes.

- Nice to see you. I'll give you a call. - All right. Take care.

Could we just go, please? Could we go?

You're so money, and you don't even know it!

What do you think, Mike?

Look, I know what that's like.

Oh, Mike, you don't want all that fuckin' Pirate of the Caribbean horseshit.

Can't you just talk to me for five minutes?

Well, lovely makeup job you have there.

'Cause you never shut up about it! You're like a little whiny bitch.

- Yeah. Oh, hang on a second- - I could call back.

Ma'am! Where do the high school girls hang out around here?

Well, who's your booking agent?

Is he clean, Micheal!

- He should wait two days. - If he's smart about it-

That's not gonna be good enough. I wanna make plans to see you again.

Vegas, baby. Vegas.

Yeah! Winona! Winona! - Winona, Baby. Winona!

When you don’t put up with their bullshit

- I want to leave. - You're a big winner.

Fuckin' blood came out of his fuckin' mouth. It was nasty, man.

Well, I guess I should be getting home. It's really getting late.

You called me? Well, who did you talk to? I was home Monday.

- I got fuckin' Wayne. - Pause it!

Hey, Mike, if you want to talk about Michelle, give me-

- That guy? - Oh, he's a bad guy.