Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

[laughing] I know!

Welcome to eighth grade, you girlbosses.

The motion passes!

Ugh, my dad doesn't even have a private recumbent bike.

-[dryer blowing] -Reading you loud and clear, big mama.

Okay, homeroom was rough, but I can do math.

Yeah, like first or second, I would say.

But is that even possible?

This class is way too hard.

Indeed! Yes! Why don't you follow my fat ass to the powder room?

Holy snots, they're making out.

Really? I like how she sings everything.

So are you! You put in a tampon!

-[squeals] -You cannot spaz out like you usually do.

what's the target audience for Cafeteria Girls?

I think it's a great idea.

This summer I went to camp. Um...

-That's a strong choice. -But it worked. They think I'm rich.

girls should be younger than their boyfriends.

God, they make me feel twelve and a half again.

[salaciously] Twelve years old.

I love you too! Who said that?

[laughing] Oh, my God. I still have his earlobe in my locket!

-...in Somalia. -What?

Aw, you know what helps me study?

Are you kidding? You're like a hot, sexy cougar.

[gasps] Oh, my God, is that Missy?

♪ It's all fish sticks, friends and fun ♪

-Now who's booing us? -Yeah, what's going on?

We literally just broke up with our eighth-grade boyfriends.

[both] ...we're making sustained eye contact with you guys.

♪ Cafeteria Girls Life is their tray-hey-hey! ♪

So you can tell me if any of the kids in your class are selling Quaaludes.

Kill the boy and fuck the parents.

Okay, well, I'd rather you showed the whole class right now.

welcoming the seventh-grade girls to the school."

Well, joke's on you, sweetheart, 'cause that was a fake name.

We slid here on our own discharge.

And even though I was held back for a really funny reason,

I keep reading the same paragraph, and it makes less and less sense.

Jessi, what is this supposed to be?

Okay, this has been my time.

-I'm just-- -Relax, I'm skipping too.