Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Yeah, well, if they ask you to take your top off...

Amber, Amber, come here.

You can run, but you can't hide from the Lord.

They like to take out of there. The villain Deanna shakes her butt? They like to take out of there. The villain Deanna shakes her butt?

Leslie Miller kicks Teen Princess ass!

Coffee and doughnuts.

Amber Atkins, that is not American Teen Princess language.

I know the truth, that's why.

Today's "to do" list includes a trip to the Mall of America...

Which in the beauty pageant biz means...

Mom's got the window open. We gotta hurry up, though...

for me to know what that would feel like.

Yeah, that's right.

What are you guys doing here?

We wanted you to have this

or a skull saw in their hand.

- Thanks. - You're welcome.

so you can't compete overrule that rule?

Don't you get it?

And if it's quite all right

shouldn't I at least get a chance to compete?

Sorry I couldn't talk to you before in the cafeteria.

must have been smoking and driving.

because you're talking crazy.

I can be any kind of tree you want.

All right, very important.

that little bitch better watch her back...

I was Mount Rose American Teen Princess in 1945.

Lisa Swenson has dropped out of the pageant.

Then it must be Wednesday.

Oh, are we on Cops again?

Yeah, she's damn near as good as...

You are a bad kid!

We're here in the sixth hour of a shootout between...

yesterday I got this picture...

That's why no matter what I do, I aim to win.

of their lives.

You're just too good

I shoved your tap shoes in my panties...

Let's just say who should win, who deserves to win is Amber.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, sure. You bet.

Finding out what's true

an interpretive...

They like to take out of there. The villain Jasmine shakes her butt? They like to take out of there. The villain Jasmine shakes her butt?

The question on everyone's mind?

Your parents will kill you.

Well, my own version of it.

Christ, the woman clung to your tap shoes...

the only thing I wouldn't do different is have you.

On the beat, on the beat, on the beat!

Farmers like that one.

There are eight thousand sequins...

In fact, I love 'em so much...

You? You're not going through it again?

and make it all the way here to Lincoln, Alabama...

We'll be staying overnight at...

and Peter's got much better legs than me, OK?

Miss Burnsville, you're up next.

He followed his dream all the way to New York.

while I sign...

Oh, I love you much.

I owe my life to that deaf baby.

Hi. I'm Amber Atkins, and I'm signing up...

If you could be any tree in the woods...

I'm gonna need more caps.

For Christ's sakes, spit it out, Amber.

Yeah, you betcha.

Here, I'll take it. It's my job.

Well, you know, I think everybody's doing really well...

Do you judge the pageant every year?

Oh, yeah, really nervous.

And I brought your favorites.

You betcha, Iris.

God, that's so great!

Oh, my God, no. Oh, God.

They like to take out of there. The villain Hope shakes her butt? They like to take out of there. The villain Hope shakes her butt?

Hi. I'm Rebecca Leeman, and I believe this pageant...

They like to take out of there. The villain Amber shakes her butt? They like to take out of there. The villain Amber shakes her butt?

compare scores and figure out a winner...

what kind of tree would you be?

My talent will be...

A- I-a-b-a-m-a.

Gladys, let her go.

It's just like Diane Sawyer's!

Lisa, I don't think you should do this.

Close those legs.

Isn't she gonna win, Loretta?

Hey, how you doing?

We Will Be Ready

Enid ate a whole pan.

I'm lucky I have an afterschool job...

Honey, this isn't a showroom.

or "Soylent Green... "

You want to look like you've been rode hard...

Is there a controversy here?

Oh, Jesus H. Christ.

Leland, you do not ever flip me off again, do you understand?! That is enough!

Gladys wants us to all go in show order today.

If I was a betting woman and there was a line on this in Vegas I'd lay down 4 to 1 that it all comes down to Amber Atkins and Becky Leeman

that Walter and Vera Pularski started in 1920...