Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Nah. I think I'm, like, due or something.

It can't feel good.

- Sammy Davis, Jr. - Yeah, the Jew.

Yeah, it's just gone.

when a peanut farmer was in the White House...

“ Jesus loves winners.”

And can you believe it?

Beautiful as a whore's ass today, huh, boys?

Take a memo, sweetheart!

So, beyond this pageant you must have certain dreams...

I open my locker today after first period...

They like to take out of there. The villain Mar shakes her butt? They like to take out of there. The villain Mar shakes her butt?

Doreen gave us hair nets.

That bitch from Wisconsin!

Hey to the folks.

and we still have one more contestant... number eight.

I’m the winner And I’m going to Kings

Ladies and gentlemen...

Remember to count, ladies.

She wanted you to have this.

So, here, put a dab of this on the old choppers, ladies.

do not cross their legs like streetwalkers.

It's front-page news when one of 'em takes a shit.

Nice, Ma. Real nice.

I kind of misunderstood the assignment.

Hey, hey, you like it?

Let's form a line.

Iris, stop it. It's not his fault.

Who would you pick to be the president, dead or alive?

This pageant's like a Roach Motel.

Fly high and proud

Yeah, sure. You have a super day, too.

Nice mouth you got there...

For one thing, we're all God-fearin' folk.

Oh, Amber, wait!

I just wanted my mom to see me dance.

You know what? It's my daughter...

She could be paralyzed from the neck down...

Why don't you just paint a target on your ass?

Well if they ask you to take your top off, get the money first

when I was visiting my brother Peter there.

while flying through the air like a goddamn lawn dart.

With two weeks until the pageant...

God, I hope that's you and not your concussion talking.

Oh, gosh, she's been singing and dancing...

for my sixteenth birthday.

Do you like to swim?

She was the oldest living Lutheran.

It makes me proud to be an American.

But the show must go on.

Now, that's my cue.

If you want seconds, I'll make sure you get them!

Hey, Tim, Carla, listen...

Nah. Hazard of the trade.

You know what, girls?

Don't touch her.

What's your problem?

because, I mean, we don't know who the winner is yet.

I was supposed to go first.

Why are you pretending you don't know what's going on?

it's half full.

No. Loretta called. There's been a fire.

He'll give 'em to you...

You know, practically...

I've never seen anything like it before, and...

"Who knows the last time it's been cleaned?"

Now she's as dead as a doornail.

With one week to go before the pageant, I was finishing my outfit, rehearsing my talent, brushing up on current events, and running 18 miles a day on about 400 calories. I was ready.

They like to take out of there. The villain Payton shakes her butt? They like to take out of there. The villain Payton shakes her butt?

Yeah. Open it up.

And tuck in the tushes!

Yeah. I'll always remember what she wrote in the card.

brushing up on current events...

Can't take my eyes

She's skinny, Amber, not deaf.

What kind of a mental retard...

It's just a camera I keep in the glove compartment...

It's just the guys that are, you know...

Amber, we are not putting on our talent costume.

It's a $200 fine!

You never know who could have an embalming needle...

I never liked her, but she didn't deserve...

all to bring me into this world...

She said he was so horny.

No. It's all right. Don't worry about it.

Whoo! Go, Muskies!

where you can take an ugly old mountain...

because living in a country where Lady Liberty...