Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

- Close your eyes. Ha, ha. - Heh.

BOY: What's up, narc?

It's just one quick thing. It's for my article.

Ha, ha. Come on, please. It's important.

I’m my own beat friend

more kids responded until it just became its own thing.

and how it relates to enthalpic chemical change. Aww.

My best friends made me the DUFF.

Oh, uh, you're gonna use the book picture?

No, no, still worse.

Aren't you gonna go get your crown?

B, on an average day,

I was in the depression stage about my ex,

Even the gay guys wanna date her.

I'm assuming you've seen the video.

It's called a spacebar.

Sorry, practice for...?

- Actually, really good. - This year's homecoming queen is...

BIANCA: Did any of these people know

- Unh. - Good, good.

I mean, they seem like really caring, understanding people, so...

And I was all like, Bitch, if I cared what you thought, I'd ask.

BIANCA: ...I ceased to be.

DOTTIE: Bianca, let's go. You'll be late for school.

have gone up 15 cents in the cafeteria and...

Even if you weren't in a group, like Creepy Carrie Raskowitz.

I thought we were friends.

- Easy. - Real chatty Cathy.

How could you guys not tell me this whole time that I was your DUFF?

BOY: Come on, man.

And, um, I don't know, it's, like, my fault pretty much.

Yeah, I was kind of having trouble getting him to notice me,

Oh, yeah. You know...

Talking to Toby scares you, right?

but I did regret how I left things with Jess and Casey.

- I'm gonna get started. - I have to...

so let's just forget it, okay?

[CREW LAUGHING]

That's your third F. I don't know what's going on with you.

the cops busting up the party,

When I told them that you were here,

Got a second to talk to a fan?

JESS: Mark Warshaw? - Smells like trash.

Or maybe I'll Google celeb nip slips. Curtains open.

Hey-oh. Go slow, okay? Let the tension build.

All right, so, what's the number-one mistake

That's just the way it is. Football guys, they date hot chicks.

But every so often, there's that one moment in high school

Speaking of stones, rock-hard abs.

I mean, you got the easy part. You could pass science in your sleep.

- No. - Be totally gangster about it, okay?

Actually, I mean, what had happened was, I was at...

You called me brat and liar Adrien

Bianca, she has the hottest friends.

Home. Wasn't feeling good.

GIRL 1: Ouch. I feel bad for Toby.

running and screaming for their lives.

Yeah, no shit, it's not.

Yeah, it's actually not my job to give you pervy intel

- I'm a DUFF. - I'm a DUFF.

Look at me, Toby.

so, Caitlyn, I wanna go over by the stage and get the very best lighting.

But only because you're a dipshit and a man-whore.

but I combined my ex with depression,

Enjoy those saggy balls.

I give you Wesley Rush.

Excuse me, that is not like us right now.

Good? Wow, that's really a rave review.

- Problem solved. - Oh, hey.

where they stood in the social hierarchy?

You know, like Tony Romo, he's a Dallas Cowboy.

- You... You look great. - Thanks. That's enough.

What do you want from me?

Now that I'm here, I'm sure. Your move.

BOY: Whoo! We're gonna kick some ass!

you gotta lighten up, and you're gonna have to trust me.

The thing you have to understand

- It's go time. - Okay.

All right, well, you held up your end of the bargain,

You know, have fun playing intramural Wii golf this season, dick face.

I don't know that many people.

You got a uniboob, your posture sucks, and your clothes fit weird

- Don't you hate me? - I'm glad you asked. Yes, I do.

Okay, so how do you set the tone at dinner?

- Tss, pfft. Pfft. - Right?

WOMAN [ON COMPUTER]: I am the DUFF.

I mean, why else would two super-hot, popular girls

Anupam and Lena, where are we on the school-lunch article?

- I hate you. - No, you look adorable.

And you never seem to have this problem.

Look, I have a crush on this boy.

This is a DUFF.

Look, we're going through something over here.

BIANCA: Nightmare. I'd only been trained for Dave & Buster's.

Duuff ings Yah man

The site has thousands of comments and likes on it.

who's RT'ing them all day long.

I can't believe you made all this sushi.

Yeah, and in this case,

Yeah, I like that.

- All right, well... BIANCA: Okay.

- Half price now or double at the door. - We're gonna be late.

So, you have to pass the chemistry midterm, okay?

[IN ENGLISH] Okay.

because I'm loving it.