Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

- You'll get over it. - I'll work harder.

This is called the Reply Churlish.

It is better than real school. It's free, and you don't get raped in the hallways.

Arse licking school

Hilary van Doren.

Like your dick?

Get away from there. What are you doing?

What about your father?

Would you sign my yearbook?

There he is, Ralph Garci, right on the button.

I must remember this feeling and use it in my acting.

What a glorious feeling I'm happy again

- This is a great pad. MONTGOMERY: You like it?

Well, my doctor told me...

Please welcome the comedy stylings of Ralph Garci, ladies and gentlemen.

I did a couple of days as a male nurse.

If I ask you to hold me tight

[MAN TALKS OVER RADIO]

...while Mom was with Tchaikovsky, Ravel, Mantovani.

With your hands on your hips.

She thinks about the kids...

Impulse to impulse.

Replacement? What do you mean, replacement?

Good for all the bunch Hey, now

You make a big deal about pulling us out of the gutter, yet you won't eat with us.

Well, I mean, everybody falls in love with their analyst.

That's all it takes.

He's in New York State Penitentiary. He's doing time.

I want to see the leg, Patrick.

You can see them every day.

Don't be somebody else.

- ...because I can't read stories! - Don't you think of anyone but yourself?

- It isn't the time. I don't wanna hear it. - You're going to hear it!

Be needing your love

My mother doesn't have a place for me where she lives...

- Something like that. - That's what I mean.

I'm singin' in the rain Just singin' in the rain

Scattered pictures

The blackness would hit me

Drinking those moments when

Aren't you the one that does that hot, smoky number in the red dress?

Get rid of the gum.

And he went for me, and...

- All right, page one, Act 1. - All right, page one, Act 1.

[BATON TAPPING]

BRUNO: I got it set on sawtooth.

Who taught me? My father taught me. He's in Spain. He makes Westerns.

How you doing? How are you?

I live in the South Bronx.

- Be honest. Be simple. Be yourself? - Be yourself.

Feel it against the backs of your legs.

This is an opportunity to perform.

I remember this one night he got bothered...

Well, get him one.

- ...and don't worry about anybody else. - I don't think I can. I can't just stare.

...can come up here and do what they want.

I could do it in 4/4 if you prefer a disco beat.

- I'll serenade Mars - I'll serenade Mars

I see. How about sign language?

You don't belong there.

RALPH: Nice. - Get off!

I've had a lot of help.

MONTGOMERY [SINGING]: Is it okay if I call you mine?

Performers aren't safe. We're pie-in-the-face people.

She'll take every dime

Lift the bow off the string, Martelli.

I can't if you flunk me out. I have to pass.

Mama, it was just one night!

It's the most painful memory I can think of.

...and put it in your mouth...

Mozart wouldn't do this today.

Nobody talks about it, but there's a quota system.

Graduating from P.A. is no Academy Award. You know what I mean.

Something wonderful is happening to me, Mama. I'm growing up.

It's a party, Doris. They need a singer.

...there's no room for a baby.

Diction. Watch your diction, Ralph. You're slurring your words.

Shit! I'm sorry. Excuse me. Fuck it.

- ...in the whole world once. - What did he play?

MAN: Of course. Welcome to Catch a Rising Star.

- I said I'm sorry! - It takes fucking wings.

Like the corners of my mind

Every time I walk into that barracks, I get a kind of...

And our regulars would like to wish a warm welcome...

What do you want? Insurance? You're in the wrong business.

Excuse me. Fuck it. Thank you very much.

MAN: Excuse me.

TONIC FAME IN THE BUILDING SON TONIC FAME IN THE BUILDING SON

I don't know why a girl hasn't grabbed you.

I mean, break a leg, or whatever they say.

I'm also a real smart guy too.

- I said I can read! - Then read.