Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

♪ Just a-shittin' out pops Like a soda machine ♪
I don't know if any of these hunks is your real dad.
♪ So many dads ♪
I think if I just kind of fold it… [grunts]
[laughing]
Because we're not your real dads, stupid. We just wanted your money.
Oh, just like in our song.
I know we're having a blast,
The dads take this vow, or whatever, to protect their daughters' virtue.
that we need to protect from their own sexuality.
♪ Mom's postcards Show a life of grand adventure ♪
♪ Secretly wants to bone me ♪
I can't even eat my favorite meal, Diane's vagina.
Well, I have no dad,
A jubilant feast.
Dad fucking decked him, and then Grandpa got up and cleaned the house.
Uh, just grow a vagina and eat your own pussy, Elliot.
-What? -Oh, okay.
Pay attention. Jesus, Rodney.
when she must look her mother's parole officer in the eye
Her parole officer, Rodney, rushed me to the mouth hospital.
♪ Gonna snack away All my stress and strife ♪
It's actually a very charming and relatable story.
Diane is God.
[gasps] Holy molten cheese bites. I'm gonna be a bazillionaire.
I said your wife's a bitch.
Do what now?
asking him to be her chosen father figure.
-And, honey, I was the salutatorian. -[knocking on door]
my friend's dad's genital torture device, right?
No. In this family, we use our hearts, not our fists.
Yeah, it was gonna pay for Bros 4 Life's big comeback.
I'm very scared of God.
-[laughing] -Oh man, what a day.
Piety? Abstinence? He is a bad influence.
Ew, Rodney, what are you doing here?
Oh, contented sigh.
Ooh, Jessi, you and your dad should come.
♪ I'm every orphan's wildest dream ♪