Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Ah, you saucy boy.

It's going really well, I think.

You'd be better off going anti-clockwise.

Right. Okay. Where is he from?

It was a lovely poem.

# The winner takes it all #

[belching] pleasure from killing as I do.

No, he's the man who comes and does my boiler.

Yeah, Michael Sheen.

This is just...

"and awe for the skill, imagination, and restraint

They gave me an assignment in Las Vegas.

you know, crank it up a bit.

"at the rate he set off.

What, that's...

as well as shredded radishes

I'll ring you, okay?

so yes, I live nearby.

and they want to work with the genius.

Now, listen, you take care of yourself.

Love is not strong enough to describe what I felt about it!"

I guess I got in at, like, 3:00 or 4:00 maybe.

You need the right film.

He found it very difficult.

- Lovely to meet you. - Lovely to see you.

followed by duck, lamb encore.

You wouldn't be able to come back with your man in a box

I'm fucking brilliant!

They're gonna pay for everything,

[normal voice] Fucking yeah.

I don't want to listen to you all the time.

Are you Steve Coogan?

I'm gonna cut to the chase.

it's something that we enjoyed a long time ago.

and then and only then, sire, go thee to bed.

We rise at daybreak.

# Endless talking #

This is Langdale.

I think anyone over 40 who amuses themself

everything's exhausting when you're past 40.

Well, I can't leave you in the car.

We don't think... well, there isn't very much evidence

- Are you all right? - Yeah, fine.

You chose not to be.

[phone ringing]

Can you hear me now? Can you hear me now?

[as small man] I don't think you should say that.

If I can avoid it.

Mmm. What's yours like?

Younger women because of their life-giving qualities,

[clears throat]

'Cause you're panicking. You know I'm about to...

Yolanda, did... have we met before?

"from the fiendish dream,

The Scotts, Tony and Ridley,

All you can do is do something someone's done before

No, he wouldn't, but I mean, if they'd been around...

of what life is.

You know, I was actually in that film?

Well, the Farrelly brothers want to work with you, okay?

If only to pad out the numbers, you know.

There was a lot of heat in my scallops.

through caverns measureless to man down to a soundless sea.

Okay, can you get phone reception around here?

- And yours? - Steve.

Okay, look, I'm sorry.

She was only 15 years old.

Your name comes up on the screen.

Rob's being, you know, sort of a pain in the ass,

[mumbled] Can you see them receding?

Oh, it's lovely.

This is a wild and windy moor.

You could have been here with me.

I have owed to them in hours of weariness...

She was only 16 years old. She was only 16...

11 years. Something like that.

like, Wuthering Heights...

Oh, Wuthering Heights. Yeah.

I think three days should be the maximum

[authoritative voice] Gentlemen, to bed.

in one of the tourist shops around here.

Yeah, we're very fortunate today.

Your roast cod with truffle ravioli

Yes, well, it's as broad as it's long, isn't it?

and he won't go to school.

Okay. You sure you don't want one?

I'd like to play...

She was lovely.

because I'd rather have these moments of genius

you can have some reception there.

[attempting to mimic sound]

Sleep the sleep of 1,000 martyrs.

And when it's not done well, it's very frustrating.

with an urban landscape.

I'd like a vodka martini, shaken, but not stirred.

[phone ringing]

What, do you think I'm gonna go to Las Vegas

Thank you, Brother Rob.

It's not a metaphor! Fuck.

Right, and did we do something afterwards?

Bobby Moore. Dudley Moore.

going on about the French Revolution.

What, Jeremy Clarkson?

A big block of ice, say, a kilometer thick,

Gentlemen, to bed, for we leave at 9:30 on the dot.

and you can look at my live video to prove...

spending a lot of time over there, though.

He was Swedish.

[laughs] Thank you.

If I sort of do this Hugh Grant, might that sort of...

'cause I've seen so many horrors that I'm just immune to it.

has come down... several octaves.

and that'll take us almost all the way to Cartmel.

[gravelly voice] And all of the cigars

Okay. All right. Thank you.

" And less could not fix his desultory ambition.

[as Pacino] What do you mean it's not looking good?

It's so early, shouting like that.

about who I've met before and who I haven't,

Beautiful, yeah.

You still go on dates, do you?

If you were to allow your child to have an illness,

The fields are gay

Between three, it's terrific.

- Yes. - Yeah, I heard it.

- Really? - Great.

Should be a reservation under the name "Coogan."

and you're, like, some guy who's, like,

onto the limestone, which is calcium carbonate.

Excellent. Let's move on. Good.

"Academy Award winner, Steve Coogan."

- No, that's not far from here. - Oh, really?

because behind every little, pithy, vaguely amusing joke