Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

seven days before.
Let's go, Doc! Hurry up.
-Jesus. -I don't know yet.
Two thousand.
When you begged me to get that abortion, I believed you.
Ohh!
-Man, thank God it's Friday. -Friday?
God bless you, son. I believe you do.
We know you've been locked up five and a half years. Pussy is pussy.
-Mira, papi. Big Time! -What's up? How you doing?
All right, I'm, uh--
If we work together, we can both get what we want. You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, huh? Come on. Sit down.
Look, you've got to come to this school.
What's up?
You puke back there, my main man Crudup will see to it...
Behind the game behind the game
But he knows how to pass. He plays with his teammates.
We feel responsible for the both of you.
-You going to cry now or something? -Why you got to push--Whoa!
-Not good. -What's wrong, dear?
You having a good time? Because you look so good.
And, uh...
What do you want, what do you need What will you find
You really think you're slick, huh?
30,000. That's a small trailer home in North Carolina...
Look, son, why don't you-- What you got there, a Range Rover?
-How you doing? You all right? -Okay.
Check the papers Well, I bet on ices
Jake, please sit down. Sit down.
What did I tell you about listening to what people say?
Now listen from the beginning 'til I reach the ending
-We're glad you're here. -We're having a little talk.
Oh, yeah.
'Cause when you get mad, you can't play.
Don’t be a hater
Call 9-1-1. Go ahead. Call 9-1-1. Go, go.
He played himself-- four years, varsity, at Big State.
It's been a long time.
That's one.
Within one week, a truck came and moved you and your kid sister out.
-Coach is back. -I need to see you in my office now.
-First, number one-- -God ain't shit.
You hit those?
-Everybody in the hallway. -This is a party. It's a long hallway.
Thank you. I just did it. Built it from scratch.
When I watched Kenny Anderson's stuff,
Sip, sip, sip on this.
Yup
Well, technically, it's mine.
Hey, how you doing? I'm Jake Shuttlesworth. I'm Jesus' father.
Let me think about it.
-Huh? -Hello, Uncle Jake.
Go ahead. Take off.
Oh, so you just got the court built inside the house, huh?
Why waste all that valuable time commuting back and forth...
I'm going to take care of you, with interest if you want!
-We got game, they got game he got game -What's going down
Let's get rid of this first.
You know, we're going to get married...
-Why don't we go inside? I'll show you my house. -We'd love to.
-Yeah? -The ones in the front.
To be a good actress?
It might feel good It might sound a little something
Hold on. This is the right place for me.
-Can you? -I can't wait.
We know all about you. We love you.
because of what he's overcome in his life.
All right.
Everybody says you're going to play pro ball and have your own Nike sneakers...
-We got to play for real. -And don't be confused
-May I ask you a question, talk to you about something? -About what?
-We need to stay out in the hallway. -Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
I know how you feel, son, but the fact remains he is your daddy.
-It don't make no sense. -It makes perfect sense. He smells the money.
That's right.
First quarter, Knicks up one. Jordan for three?
Yes, Jesus! Oh!
Why you allow this, this, this... pimp, you know, to just--
First thing that's going to take you out is these drugs they got for you.
Daddy, how'd you get out? I thought you were going to be away a long, long time.
-139, 150 with tax. -One-fifty? Where the holes at?
Pygmy buzzards be hovering over you trying to get that loose change.
Full athletic scholarship, that's all?
I want you to go to Big State, son.
-Go to sleep. -Good night.
Stop right there!
-Okay. -No. No, Jake.
If my mother ever saw me with a white bitch, she'd spin in her grave.
Take Yo Pepto Bismol Bottle Ass on in the Bedroom Why the Fukk Yo Chuck E Cheese Kool Aid Man Looking Ass Gotta Talk to Auntie Like That?
You're going to get mad when you get pushed?
You want to throw up, let us know. We'll pull over.
-What are the assistant coaches doing in the hallway? -Yeah. Right here, man.
And I'd appreciate it if you don't ever walk through that door ever again.
ESPN gets religion as we follow a day in the life of Abraham Lincoln senior...
Gibby
Through the fast lane in the game
I'm just saying that there's a reason and I can at least admit it.
-Jesus! -Look at that.
They think they know it all.
I got Calculus.
You ain't got to worry about me no more.
@ folks hatin on drake
that's been missing us for mad years.
-That's my baby. -That's right. My boy.
I ain't even got to ask it
I just don't want to see you beholden to somebody for something you done took.
Don't even lie. Tell me the truth.
Buddy, you know what this is?
Don't be talking about my mother, all right? Please.
Take a seat right there.
If man is the father the son is the center of the earth
@champagnepapi #scorpion
Yeah, that was luck, anyway.
I want you meeting the assistant coaches.
What’s up with all the familiarity
All right.
Yeah. I'm a lucky Negro.
Always messing around. That's why I can't mess with y'all, man.
Off the court, I can't tell you a damn thing.
The thought of reparation's got him playing with the population
Bitch, what-- Get your motherfucking--
-I do. -How you spell it?
All those lips, all those hips? All those honey dips?
Hey, hey, you know how much Hilfiger this buys?
No. I don't think nothing like that.
-Yeah. I feel the same way. -Do you? That's good. That's lovely.
Yeah.
-Just call me the leprechaun. -That's your last basket.
I'm talking about when he was with the Bullets down at Winston-Salem Stadium...
Go get it, the ball. Go get it.
More than your eyes can see and ears can hear
-Did your father tell you that? -No, but everybody else in the world.
-Maybe we could start being father and son again. -You ain't my father.
Just coming down the court, you got a defender in your way.
No official word yet on how he escaped.
Who the fuck does she think she is?
I'm John Chaney from Temple University.
I hope you don't think we're too forward or aggressive with the highlight film...