Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

That's great, yeah.
[PHONE RINGING]
Okay.
You know, I'm not charming via text.
I know that AIex wasn't just some guy.
-I don't know. Not what I expected. -My voice doesn't match my face?
WeII, first off, it's not just a bunch of nude farming. Dad.
Is that an invitation?
HoId on.
...when I came home earIy from the MaIdives.
-You make me sick. -I had no choice.
And that one answering machine housed one cassette tape...
I can do it again.
WeIcome, everybody. Thanks for coming. I'm Conor.
Oh, yeah.
You have no messages.
BuIIshit.
I don't know. I don't know.
...but made me beIieve that I was insane for being suspicious.
[''IF I NEVER SEE YOUR FACE AGAIN'' BY MAROON 5 PLAYING ON STEREO]
PAIGE: We're in Iove, you asshoIes.
.
...refuses to caII me.
I thought Mary Stuart Masterson was Watts.
what ? what ?
And you guys aII buy it. You eat it up and you Iove it.
I don't think that it's pretending.
WOMAN 2: Ken, are you aII right? MAN: Just cIutched his chest.
-He MySpaced me. -Ouch.
BEN: ExactIy.
You LYING SACK OF SHIT
...by the way. The rare exception.
-Yeah. -And?
I haven't taIked to you in a IittIe whiIe...
I'II wait at the bar.
Excuse me?
If you're not wood, don't try and Iook Iike wood.
Come on, my boy. Take it home.
BEN: Hello? -Hey, Ben. This is Anna Marks.
GIGI: Do you know who it is? -No.
Hey, KeIIi Ann.
(80S SYNTHESIZED POP SONG PLAYING)
So I think the best I can do is...
[PHONE RINGS]
...because I don't know, I feIt Iike that geIIed.
WeII, what is the point?
BOTH: Bon Jovi.
-Your face. -Don't make her cry.
AII right, Iook, I wanna say something, okay?
I was just thinking about you.
I'm sitting right in front of you.
How couId he aIready not Iike me?
I mean...
-Oh, can you hoId on? -Okay.
Okay, you are sexy, very sexy.
Yeah.
Oh, reaIIy. How do you know?
GIRL: Oh, a pass. ALEX: You work too hard.
Let me get the door.
This is a Iie, Ben.
Oh, the spark thing is buIIshit.
That I have to stop thinking that every guy wiII change.
Remember that notary pubIic who cheated on me?
You're just too good a guy.
-You are not getting rid of these pants. -We had a deaI, mister.
-You can store those horizontaIIy. -GoodwiII wouIdn't even take these.
Wait, what was I saying again?
Of course.
You marry her and you're an asshoIe for marrying before you're ready.
EIeven days. And now he's the worId's best husband.
BiII, so you do exist.
GIGI: But usually someone is there to offer words of wisdom.
[SIGHS]
And then he teIIs me that he's married.
I'm the exception.
Man, you have a gift.
KELLI ANN: Why? - Hm?
...Iiving on the boat...
Four categories:
Observe your breath.
Listen, I know it's been a whiIe since you caIIed.
You see how that's kind of confusing?
[SIGHS]
You came to my class.
...and put myseIf out there too much...
What?
One drink. Okay?
You can't hide it, man.
He'II caII.
mariah! Mariah! Yes we’ll find kfc yes i’m fired boing boing yes eugenie good all? ok mariah yes morgan’s tales tou ok?
Yeah. But my friend Terri once went out with a guy who never caIIed.
Yeah.
I do.
ABC Australia that not the scream ABC is working is Pixar lamp?
Oh, my word.
What happened?
And a IittIe pIate of coId cuts, if there are any Ieft.
Why did you do that?
Gonna take a shower.
Ready? LOL.
I don't....
I just mean-- I mean, I Iike you the way I Iike basset hounds.
We'll all meet for drinks and it'll be good.
-You asshoIe. -I'm sorry.
WeIcome aboard.
Yeah.
You've been there, you've seen it. I'm perfectIy capabIe of doing this.
... Pooh
It's okay. Maybe we shouId just go Iook at the griIIs and we'II come back.
-Get in the cIoset. -What?
Okay, right. ''BiII.''
I'm not smoking, I promise.
...if she caIIs you ''cuddIy'' or ''dependabIe.''
Laura, aIso your husband wouId reaIIy Iike another beer...
Are we good?
You must be Beth.
Maybe I shouId do a IittIe drive-by?
When I do a setup, I weigh the pros and cons.
...or shouId you stay to the end to have some aIone time?
Who was that?
STEVEN: Shit. -Who Iet that happen? It's embarrassing.
Or maybe it was at the end.
...and they're insaneIy happy.
-No. -No?
I'II see you Iater.
Back when everyone was just going to camp at the Y...
MARIEL: WeII, my first husband was unimpressive.
...so I'm on the precipice of staging a casuaI run-in at the City Supper CIub.
Or whatever.
That happens aII the time.
Yeah, I did.
He ordered more drinks for us when the waitress came.
ALEX: Minor oversight.
Was he hot?
It's compIicated.
I can't stay, I'm totaIIy--
ShouId I--?
What are you doing?
Okay. Okay. But what if I'm the exception?
What, you here?
...and I stayed after.
...maybe yeIIow.
We caII each other ''sweetie'' aII the time.
You Iying sack of shit!
[ALEX LAUGHS]