Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

It kind of pisses me off when people pretend like they're not.

- Well, hey, listen-- -I mean, come on.

We got a squeaker today, people. Neiman.

So, what do they want?

It's Carlton football. It's not even Division Two, it's Division Three.

- You choose. -That's my part. I'll be on your stage.

You're right. We should not be dating.

We definitely have an out-of-tune player.

That's been your problem the whole time? The Seat Height?

I know, I know. I'm almost there. I'm right there.

...if you drop the ball, you might be looking for a new line of work...

I'm not gonna be able to spend time with you.

I don't care too much. I think it just-- It changes.

I apologise to the musicians.

And in first place...

For the record, Metz wasn't out of tune. You were, Erickson.

None of us were friends with Charlie Parker. That's the point.

When you're in line and the person in front of you is not moving But he says he's not actually in line

ANSWER! aggro'd but im not tanking

How do I get to Hargrove?

That was truly pathetic.

BULLSHIT! FUCK YOU!

Hurry the fuck up. Get your music.

- I'm in Studio Band because I'm the-- -Back off.

Rushing or rushing and receiving

Me when someone makes an excuse to get out of DND

You know that for a fact?

- Fletcher's got Connolly warming up. - God fucking da-- Okay.

The Shaffer Conservatory Studio Band.

Yeah. I don't think they like me too much.

I'd rather die drunk, broke at 34 and have people talk about me...

...at the age of 34 is not my idea of success.

...soon to be Rhodes Scholar and who knows what else.

All right. Well, you better fucking hope your memory doesn't fail you.

I'll cue you alright

- Connolly's playing the part. -Like fucking hell.

You know, Caravan, Whiplash.

She did wanna be an actress when she was my age.

Sight-read measure 101.

And so for those reasons...

This is why I don't think we should be together.

ANSWER!- aggro'd but im not tanking

...that Sean...

وقنی نمی‌دونم قضیه چیه وقنی فیلم دیپک

Okay. All right.

Morgz (2014) Morgan, Big Jill, Jenson, Bald Martin, Darren, Mr. Nobles

...like a fucking 9-year-old girl.

- Hey. -How are you?

One, two, three, four. Two, two, three, four.

...which I'm afraid is even worse.

...what it was I was doing at Shaffer.

L-- I can't go on-stage. I don't know the charts by heart.

Save your travel receipts.

What do you study?

- Really? You don't. -Yeah.

All right, let's do reeds, yeah?

Only reason you're in Studio Band to begin with is because I told you...

Let's go with the Irish Mick Paddy cracker now.

Does the name Sean Casey mean anything to you?

Now, this one really upsets me. We have an out-of-tune player here.

I don't know yet.

All right, everybody, from the top.

Rushing. Five, six, and...

...and that's bad enough.

- What's your name? -it's okay. No big deal.

I will fuck you like a pig

...because your mind's on a Happy Meal instead of on pitch.

- No, it's not. -Yeah, it is.

I wanna be one of the greats.

It's all good. No worries.

- That's actually pretty mean. -That should've-- I'm sorry.

No, no, I know, I know.

- I've called 911. -Look, I gotta go.

- Start. -Five, six, seven--

Jackson, congratulations, you're fourth chair.

- Hey, guy. -What the fuck happened to you?

Who are you gonna play with otherwise? Lennon and McCartney were buddies.

- You got any friends, Andy? -No.

- Not today. -Big on the bottom. Put some sugar on it.

What the fuck did you say to me?

- One, two, three, four. -Rushing or dragging?

Hey, fuck off, Johnny Utah. Turn my pages, bitch.

Well, I don't know if I can come. I-- I'll have to check with my boyfriend.

...and your answer was to turn into a wind-up monkey.

- Am I late? -Perfect timing.

I didn't mean to hurt your feelings.

And I put him in Studio Band.

- Neiman lost it. -Yes, sir.

Wanna grab the shakers?

...I came across a kid in a practice room working on his scales.

...or you don't know you're out of tune...

You are a worthless, friendless, faggot-lipped piece of shit

All right, gang, listen up. Now, for those of you who are new at this...

Nineteen years old. Isn't he cute?

“Shaffer Conservatory.

Darnell Wright that is not your boyfriend’s DICK DO NOT COME EARLY

Now, this one really upsets me. We have a player behind in ideas

...died yesterday...

Barker, that is not your boyfriend's dick. Do not come early.

- I don't know. -Count again.

Usually it's somebody that has fucking sticks.

Six years ago...

Okay. Well, I guess maybe I'll see you guys there.

Hey, Dad, look at my paradiddle.

- That's what got you in here, right? -Oh, yeah.

- Three. -Yo, Ryan.

I guess he got discouraged.

Do you think you're out of tune?

Whiplash, bar 125.

The Shaffer Conservatory Studio Band.

So for the final ... REDACTING TIME!!!!!!!!,

As fate would have it, I recently stumbled across another kid...

...because you have bigger things to pursue.

...one, I will drum your ass back to Nassau...

...you're done.

He's dumb but he's not stupid.

That was you problem the whole time Lep direction

One and two and...

Bar 17, the and of four.

Yeah, I'll check, but I don't know.

Please go away.

No, double-time. Double it.

I'm upset!!!!! You-

Fucking piece of shit!

If one more person says “it’s okay it’s not like anything will change”