Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

- You're a doctor? - Not yet. Fingers crossed.

How long have you two been together?

- It's your birthday - Birthday

Yeah. I know it's over, and I'm looking.

You know, for your own safety, you'd better get your stuff and go.

- How are you? - Good.

Your dad told me to give it to you.

- She's not into it. - Shit. Seriously?

- I don't want to go. - Yeah, all right.

I don't want to hurt you.

- Yeah. - Shoot, I left my phone in my office...

Stop teasing him, you guys.

- This is crazy. - You made me a period mix.

Adam's episode is taping tonight, so Eli wanted to go.

It's all you. This was all you.

- Great. - That's good.

You always find something wrong with everybody who likes you.

I didn't know you were dating someone.

I mean, it's about high-schoolers who sing and dance and blog.

- "Where are you?" - What are you writing?

so we see literally hundreds of penises a week.

- OK? - No, he's ten-one.

And we... well, we'd like your blessing, Adam.

Sometimes my neck gets sore

- You live here? - Yep.

Hey, you know the best part about my gay dads?

If you're lucky, you're never gonna see me again.

We found the Great Pumpkin!

I'm getting married!

but this is like, this is really fun.

- I rowed crew at Harvard. - Oh, Harvard.

All right, we're hot. You feel hot?

Good luck with that.

How you gonna do that?

until someone agrees to have sex with me.

You know me. This stuff freaks me out.

- Do an impression, then. - Yes, do an impression.

- What did you want to talk to me about? - Wait. Just hang out here.

- I know you think it's stupid. - No. No, I don't.

I'll be back in like... an hour.

Yeah. You did a good job, so... I thought you deserved a balloon.

Good evening, sir.

Don't dress up your penis. Ever.

But the worst thing you can do in life is to say no to love.

It's nice to see they're supporting your career.

Shira, I feel like there are parts of me that I haven't explored yet.

- God, you look so beautiful. - And your eyes are so pretty.

and two of someone else's,

Yeah, well, I don't know.

Also, I'd like to leave the door open when I pee.

What are you wearing?

You really think she's just using him for his car?

I didn't take it from my parents.

- We love you already! - Come on, family hug!

- Give me that! - That's my phone!

You just gotta walk away, pal. It's over.

She drives me crazy.

By the way, tell your dad, it's like my favorite show ever.

The world can take it.

No problem at all. Just get a little closer, ladies.

It's not really possible. I have no time.

and maybe some flowers.

No, it's one milkshake, two straws. That's what makes it special.

- What are we gonna do? - About what?

"You give me premature ventricular contractions."

Well, I didn't think you'd actually do it. It's a terrible idea.

and you're gonna call me up, crying.

- Dance? - Yeah, like...

- Good seeing you guys. Have fun. - Yeah.

You just have to be drunk and look hot.

- Hey. Can I? - Hey. Of course.

I agree, it didn't work. Drop it.

Usually I spend Valentine's Day catching up on work and stuff,

Don't worry about it. I'll see you Saturday.

Wait. Should I take my shirt off, or do you want to...

You're so good at being alone. Mom and I aren't like that.

- I got it. - OK.

- Will you please say something? - Wait.

I don't know what you're talking about.

She is not my girlfriend.

To help soothe your womb.

- Patrice! Hey! - How are you?

I know this is random. I just...

I wanted to get your opinion on this episode that I wrote.