Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

I just couldn't be around you anymore, Tara.

- [Sidney grunts] - No!

I know things didn't end well with you guys, but...

Do you see this shit?

She's proud of making a fan out of you.

they give me better painkillers.

Nothing. No, I didn't do anything.

[footsteps approach]

That's the only way I can protect Tara.

of surviving a Stab movie.

- If the shoe fits... - You're not helpless, Sam.

I'm sorry about Judy.

Now I can't have sex,

Luan Loud got the umbrella

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

- That's her? - Yeah.

They seem sweet, caring, supportive. Then welcome to act 3,

A real loony tune.

"If I can't have her, no one can."

[Ghostface] Hello, Sheriff Judy.

[Tara] What does she love about me?

Okay, well, lots of people love movies.

- Bye. - [grunts]

- Are you at the hospital? - [Ghostface] Hello, Samantha.

- Meet you back at the motel. - [Richie] Sam, wait.

He's Billy Loomis's accomplice.

- Can you put this away for me? - Yes.

- [car horn blares] - [tires screech]

Hey! Watch your tone, new girl.

Well, now you're just quoting the original.

Thanks anyways, boys.

and get the fuck out?

Better than I know you.

What? I don't know, Mindy.

Taken To her closet

He found out right then from me.

[Ghostface] Hello, Samantha.

See, we had to bring the legacy characters back to make it matter.

- [line ringing] - Please, please.

[Ghostface] Who do you want to hear die?

Do you have any idea why

Luan Loud next time I see you

I tried running too.

The night before that, my sister was stabbed seven times.

Then how can I trust you when you say you're not the killer?

Then look for the killer there.

- [Amber chuckles] - [chuckles]

I can't believe I get to do you both.

Hey, hey, hey! Hello! Can we cut the music, please?

We're just a fucking joke to them?

[ringing continues]

- So? - So I want you to help us kill him.

who answers the phone and gets carved up by the killer?

but the rest of you were wandering around.

Shots, really? This is supposed to be a memorial.

Rule number one:

with the Stab movies is?

I'm right here. Come and get me.

when I was 13, looking for Christmas presents.

Hey, when are you gonna tell her why all this is happening?

- What do you think? - Trap.

Luan Loud will drink bleach

All right. Okay, yeah, no.

It's not just some schlocky, cheeseball nonsense with wall-to-wall jump scares.

and now you get attacked here.

I love you too.

I went into the basement to get beer.

For what? You saved my life.

Only one way to find out!

- [chuckles] - I'm not even gonna lie.

You call the cops, she dies.

and, what, that one of us is the killer?

[water running]

[news anchor] Just one night after a local teen was attacked in her home

Should you really be making a phone call right now?

No, no, no. Amber, I'm coming.

Stay with me, Sid. Stay with me.

[partygoer 1] But it's so early!

- That too. - Fucking asshole.

[screams] What did you do to her?

Fucking Hand Sanitizer?

Luan Loud please clam your boyfriend down bring only Men

Going by the pattern,

You're the fuck who hurt my sister?

There is a killer on the loose.

Luan Loud is popped

Luan Loud we hate you so much

You're way too boring to be a psycho.

- Hello? - [caller] Hello.

Hi. Nice to see you.

[Amber] Yeah, I came as soon as I heard.

But at least I know what I'm gonna write about.

[scoffs] Now that's a fucking villain.

I mean, it was super '90s.

Luan Loud is the lady with the umbrella

Okay, good luck.

Never go off on your own with a masked killer around.

You are my boner pills.

- I need you to get the fuck out. - I'm so sorry.

No last-minute saves this time. Your story's over!

Promise me you'll leave as soon as you can.

[Joey on TV] No, I'm not.

Okay, I'll be right back... Aha!

Get Tara out of the closet.

[revving continues]

Are you telling me that I'm caught in the middle of fan-fucking-fiction?

Time's running out.

Ask me about The Witch.

Thanks for coming, but the party's over!

For being the reason Dad left.

I just don't want to see Tara hurt again.

- Yes! Yes! - Shoot him!

- [thudding] - [whimpers]

[Charlie] Uh, I don't think I can really talk about that.

Richie, please.

[Dawson on TV] You stay there.

[Richie] Thank you. Thank you all.

- Correct. - Yeah.