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Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
I'm so happy that we're driving up to the country to see my parents.
- Hey. - Hi.
Oh, Great. Looks like our parties are on the same floor, too.
- 'Cause of my name being Joel. - Oh...
Joel, one last thing.
Your Bacon Boot company consists of you
Goodnight, Mom. Goodnight, Daddy.
Hey, catch!
I've never met anyone else who likes fiction! That is too funny.
Oh, my God! You just called me by her name.
I know. It sounds transparent, but she sounded really sincere.
The turkey.
No, I wasn't gonna say that.
And I said, "Who is this know-it-all girl?"
What?
You've probably all heard of "cup of joe". This is a play on that.
Who's this?
Uh, wait! Whatever it is, I'll have it.
Oh!
Tiffany?
He's got it!
I remember in high school, they made us read The Great Gatsby,
And I thought, "Who is this pompous guy?"
My point is...
Can I help you find something for your bubby?
out on the table, really go for broke.
"Lifestyles of the Hick and Nameless"
Thanks.
- you would go to the Brooklyn Promenade. - Yes. You see where I'm going with this?
Wait!
- Now it's New Year's! - Now it's New Year's Eve!
- She used to say "hey"? - Yeah.
First order of business, to suss out the competition.
on the yoga instructor while they were lying on my mat?
Sit your fuckin' ass down, Karen. We're not done with the story.
That is literally too funny.
And I'm not so sure I'm ready for this kind of thing...
So what will you have?
No, he did not.
If I was ever about to marry someone, and then realized
We've been having this fight since the day we met.
I get that, but what does it have to do with the two of you?
Oh, God! Oh, God!
Skin pure as the driven snow.
And get out!
That's right, everybody. I quit.
Should we give it another shot?
Joel? What are you doing here?
Vampires.
Uh, she just wanted to travel more, she wanted
Oh, God damn it!
You're like a child.
Oh, Honey, if Eggbert's the one, you'll know.
I wanted a family, settle down, start a life together.
and there was nothing I could do to stop it.
Are you really asking us that? Were you not listening to the story?
I was just devastated. So the next morning
quirky candy shop across the street from our location.
I would love to come upstairs.
You look great.
Have you ever given yourself a pap smear?
Well, he meant well. So we started seeing each other.
- But I'm sorry, I can't accept your offer. - What?
I do have a job. I'm the President and CEO of The Bacon Boot.
Yeah, you can say that again.
How about we get that coffee, huh?
it must smell more like lemon than chocolate. Got it?
- Asshole. - Cunt.
Tell her how you feel.
Yes.
I had a great time tonight.
those orgasms were as real as they get.
Go deep! Go deeper!
Well, what do you think?
I love Saturdays.
- You have to be kidding me! - Do you like fiction?
Oh, hey. I went by her store, but she wasn't there.
You are so not over her!
so do you wanna join me?
Thanks.
taking a stinky shit is better than having sex.
My beautiful Aryan princess, Molly.
You know what? You guys make a lot of sense. I'm gonna go propose.
May I help who's next?
I like things that are real
- You're good at that. - "...and wait in line."
Svandorga.
If they can't heat it up, then leave half the poppy seeds in
I am gonna have your license revoked.
- It's called Upper Sweet Side, NYC. - Kind of a dumb name for a store, huh?
If you wanna come up, uh, you know, you can.
You guys have not lived until you've tried my Creamy Caramel Clusters.
No. Come on, tell me.
Let's go, let's go!
Except of course, Father Time, who will most certainly take that away from you
Do I find you cute and funny? Yes.
- Bye now. - Wait...
I'm sorry, Trevor. Didn't you hear? You're fired!
Oh, and Tiffany wanted me to say hi. We live together now.