Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Handing each other awards for cartoons and pornography.

You get that mongoloid look when you're hung over.

And you never will.

You listening to me?

It was tweeted by @prostatewhispers.

They know the guy from the bird suit

- What are you doing? - I don't want to look at this anymore.

By the time we got to the hospital, the kid was dead.

that's what I'm talking about.

You know? Boom.

Your costumes are hanging in your dressing room.

He's the actor we've been waiting for.

I've been reborn, brother. And I can see the future.

Whoa. That's nice. Forgive him, Larry. Mike's like my 5-year-old son.

Well, feel free to take the script up until you feel comfortable.

To be honest, I didn't give a shit.

But you didn't even see it. Did I do something to offend you?

You know, before you come tomorrow night.

Thank you for an honest performance. Ray carver.

Stop smiling. You're freaking me out.

That's birdman actor riggan thomson.

So, each dash represents a thousand years.

I never knew if he was going to come out from behind a bush,

I think I'm hard.

I ignore this mental formation. This is a mental formation.

I'm sorry, what was the question?

This play is going to last forever. It's going to open in London, Paris.

We lived like fugitives then.

- Do you talk to her? - Yeah, we talk.

You know, the last time I flew here from L.A...

I just wanted to be what you wanted.

Let's go. Come on. Get up.

Oh, can we take one picture!

...previews were pretty much a train wreck. We can't seem to get through a performance...

$6.50, my friend.

No, no, forget that. Just stay with me.

Nothing is a problem for me onstage.

I mean, crying. Praying, right?

- What are you doing? - Waiting on Larry.

And I just want to let you know that, no matter what happens...

Because without me, all that's left is you...

No, you don't. That's what previews are for.

I missed my last two periods.

Maybe you are, riggan. Maybe that's what you are... a joke.

That was interesting.

What do you want me to say? My health lasted longer than the money.

- I know you're caught up in all this stuff, but... - stuff?

And I'm going to close your play.

On my back, it was like somebody was holding a frying pan to me and really burning.

Just because I didn't like that ridiculous comedy you did with Goldie hawn...

- Go into the reserve. - It's gone! We spent it on fog and fake trees...

You're beautiful and you're talented...

- Where are we going? - To get you coffee.

Birdman: The Phoenix rises.

Forget about her.

Play with my balls.

Here. Try these...

...of recorded time;

Get off me. What are you looking at?

It wasn't all Dr. drew or anything, but that dude from American pie was there.

- Pretentious, but happy. - I wasn't happy.

- I might have said that. - You might? Come on, let's go.

The cultural work done in the past by gods and epic sagas...

Sir! Where are you...? Sir!

They love this shit. They love blood. They love action.

- And I love Sam. - I know.

I know who you are.

And all the people on board are, you know, crying.

In the days before Nick's depression started to eat away at him...

Not this talky, depressing, philosophical bullshit.

So what's happening?

You're an actress, honey.

...all of our yesterdays...

Say something else.

Ralph will sue us. He will sue us and he has a case.

What? That's the best you've been.