Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

This is really happening.
I beg your pardon!
- Joe, I'm right here. Will you talk to me? - She left me. I gotta kill her.
Now, listen here, Teddy bear.
All right! Girls, go on. I'll be there in a minute.
...the doctor says...
Crazy as it seems...
...at the corner of Jones Street and Clay?
Good-bye.
I know of this funny little place.
What is this?
- We never said we weren't assholes. - I said I was an asshole.
Thank you, but no.
Now, that takes 26 weeks.
What is it? Am I talking too much?
What a pleasant surprise.
Finished with your drink, sir?
Happy birthday to you
- Want Campari and soda? - Yeah, that would be nice.
This isn't a dream anymore.
He goes riding once a week in Golden Gate Park.
How old is that suit?
What's that?
You better hurry. They moved the meeting up 15 minutes.
Is it from Theresa?
That's a gorgeous animal you have there.
Are you sure that you can't handle this by yourself, Richard?
I'm just so tired, that's all. I just don't know if I can stay awake.
Is it a woman?
More sleeve.
If anything like that ever happened to us...
- Only at night? - Ask him.
- Did you notice that she didn't have a bra? - What do I know, 'cause I see it every day?
- You know where I can buy some checkers? - That's embarrassing.
You must be joking! That's 100 feet down there.
...Irving.
Didi, what was I gonna ask you?
I'm fine.
Clean this up. Now I'm a cleaning man.
There's nothing that I say that I can remember.
Be good.
You're a silly horse!
I made a mistake, I learned my lesson...
It's a water bed.
- Come on, Charlotte! - I won't be long.
Surprise of surprises.
Please! I won't be very long.
I don't know. She asked me to keep him for one night.
Are you afraid?
Julius...
The only unpleasant surprise was that in two days...
...I met a cute, available...
Came in with a cardigan. They wanted him to put on one of their jackets.
- He said he'd be back in just... - Jake!
I'm not giving you a hard time. You either move the car, or I call the police.
- What if I had a date? - You won't have a date.
You're not like Joe.
Don't want to start a fire. They landed on the lamp.
Horseback riding?
What are they, Heads?
Good-bye.
You're going on your first date to your grandmother's?
His Daddy's little pee-pee started all this.
- What's your name? - Theodore Pierce. Teddy. Ted.
...but, boy, is he dumb!
This isn't fucking happening! It's not happening!
- He wasn't due back until Friday. - But it's only Wednesday.
Tomorrow, 6:00, Tulio's.
Hello?
Don't move!
- Is Mr. Pierce there, please? - That's it, just like that.
My mother and father are Jewish.
...because it's a wonderful surprise.
The captain has just informed me that L.A. Airport is closed due to heavy fog.
- You're taking my little girl to see David Boowie? - Bowie.
Guess what he saw galloping through the fog?
Shelly!