HOT
APP
STORIES
QUIZZES
DISCOVER
MEMES
EMOJI
More
CREATE STORIES
DAILY
DISCOVER
PHRASES
NUDGE CLIPS
CONTENT REQUEST
LOGIN
HOT
APP
STORIES
QUIZZES
MEMES
EMOJI
STORY
DAILY
PHRASES
DISCOVER
NUDGE CLIPS
REQUEST CONTENT
×
Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips
Yes! And I'm your mother!
She was adopted.
broom closet around here somewhere, huh?
to our very distinguished judge,
Unfortunately, no.
and I lost the ticket that they need to take, plus, I lost my pass.
and we were kicking field goals with it
And he will lead them straight to Penny.
Oh.
Anyway. Sorry about that whole thing.
Oh, it's okay, Lloyd.
All right.
Wonder? Yeah.
We'll never get another chance like this.
You
Not my mom!
The event's been sold out for over a year, and the security is insane.
So you see,
TRAVIS: Uh, you know what? I'm going to make a rule.
what are you doing here?
No! No. We can't.
Give me the box! Here you go.
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
I'll come up with a plan.
You see...
I'm thinking of a number between one and three.
You're kidding. She's on our team now?
Okay-
(HORN HONKING)
See?
Oh.
(GROANING) The side with the stamp!
Black and white Yoshi how dare you go to the theater to see Barbie 2023 You're grounded mister so no watching South Park no fortnite no Minecraft
all proprietary rights.
Right after we finish playing Funnel Nuts.
We're gonna have to take a walk.
He)', Har!
(LAUGHS)
(HORN HONKING)
Uh,yeah,yeah, I'm on it.
Okay. The reason I'm here is...
I just received this postcard that you sent me 22 years ago.
RECEPTIONIST: May I help you?
(CHUCKLES)
Look at the postmark.
You know what, you're right. I did have it.
I brought some protection.
Because I don't even know what they're up to.
it used to be richard marx making adut duom so late for everyone to arrive at the hub to talk about aged care but she quit so it would be marleen roch taking those duties wouldn't it? yes it would.
"It will all sort itself out later. You'll see!"
And I'm gonna make sure it gets to my daughter, safe and sound.
No way! Really?
(CHUCKUNG)Om Thanks,Dad.
I think I know a shakedown when I see one.
...you lose a point. And you can't smell your own farts, either.
My father's name's not Harry.
When your Grindr date Meets you in person
but we've gotta get this man's shoulder cleaned out.
Yeah. Oh! Great news. Your dad showed up for the conference.
Wow.
The event will be letting out soon.
"Yeah, Well, You're Doing A Great Job So Far
(PINCHELOW CLEARS THROAT)
(LAUGHING)
(INHALES)
Nuthin but a g thang
anyway- --
I'll be honest. It's not my favorite thing.
and then when you're ready...
(SING SONG) I just saved humanity!
Now go away.
But, Lloyd, we don't have a phone number or address,
BARBARA: It's marvelous to meet you, Mrs. Pinchelow.
po kari po
A gift for Dr. Barbara Walcott
and, frankly,
After you left for El Paso,
but, uh, does Dr. Pinchelow have Asperger's?
(BOTH SNICKERING)
Oh, okay.
He needs it.
What in God's name?
(BOTH GASP)
(GASPS)
I know he doesn't wipe real well.
I'll get you a freshie.
so we can really get to know each other.
Yep-
C-Section Or Au Snatch-Urel?
(GIBBERING)
No, Lloyd!
Roommate?
Thanks a lot, lady!
is not the same as having sex.
(GROANING)
What?
There's no diamonds here!
Unfortunately, I don't have him at the moment,
HARRY: For starters, how was the pregnancy?
Thanks.
Not if Floyd was the last name!
If we find Fraida, we find your kid.
Penny, do you have the speech I wrote for you?
I'll see them. Let them in. (INTERCOM BUZZING)
Now that is hot.
Because we never had sex.
Look at her! She's got it down!
I have an idea.
Very good.
who's filling in for laura newsome? charlotte perkins gilman.
TRAVIS: Yeah. (GRUNTS)
That sucks!
Oh, what's in the box, honey? Mmm.
You guys are so cool.
Huh. Junk mail, junk mail.
If we find your kid, we find your kidney.
We just have to make sure that his daughter gets this box.
The obituary said he was survived by his parents.
and I'm supposed to be making the speech,
Especially when you eat prunes!
This is a letter from your real mother, Fraida, that you sent back to her.
(ALL GRUNTING) (YELLING)
(SCREAMING) What the hell are you doing
Look, Harry.
(GROANS)
toxic katie dalton was bohoouoieriiueyueyesuuiiihop's bohpa bohpa bohpa bohooumppmerooboumpcare boogiiuuryeyeyisisiss's bohpa bohpa obobopuppeooswieieiuueuudjj biiofllhoyprodsdo wasen't she? she was! and to this day she still is!
Me? (LAUGHING) Yeah, right! Nice try!
When Eddieboi is up to bat after James sucked on Beller like a Capri sun
(CHUCKLES) When Harry young,
What?
(MUMBLING)
Don't touch that joystick! (STRAINING)
Painting with Ken Ross
Relax!
Come on, Harry!
That's the single most boring sentence I ever heard.
Got it.
LLOYD: I'll give you a hint.
Jim Carrey when he sees his daughter playing Mario
(SNORING)
So what does your cookie say?
You might want to put a dab Of bactine on that.
I'm sorry, sir. What is this?
Harry, people who come to these things are smart.
Why, thank you! Mmm.
I don't want this coming back to us.
After all you've lied to everyone else .
Did you give him the key to our apartment?
"You will do important things in the world."
on the Block Island Ferry.
Oh, no. No.
You mean, under the bed?
who's filling in for jack arrah? benjamin wright.
Harry, don't you hear that?
See, we don't want to be tied down by anything or anyone.
You're trying to swindle her out of a kidney!
like if we were just passing a slaughterhouse...
but I'll bet I would have been a pretty good dad.
(HOWLS)
like the toe-sucking rat that you are.
(CHUCKLES) Sheesh!
Because of the postcard.
THAT SOUNDS EXPENSIVE
And I thought that I grabbed it,
If you smell a fart, and you didn't do it,
I remember I kicked one over the telephone wires, and you said...
DR. MELDMANN: So let's give a warm, KEN welcome
Yeah, I remember that!
Thanks, Mom.
What? Are you certain? I thought he was sick!
What about the old Stinkeroo?
I mean, the shock treatments, the partial lobotomy!
(GROANING)