Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

Hey, after all, being misunderstood

# And dance the blues #

This is about Howard coming to Washington.

What the hell's going on? What are you doing, man?

Wait. Excuse me for one minute. Robin...

And very important,

[Unenthusiastically] W N BC.

Hello. I'm Robin Quivers,

And finally, today is Memorial Day.

I'm in a good mood. Let's take some phone calls

and 6 weeks later, the new ratings came out.

Howard, I was in the military.

# Ooh-ooh-ooh dee dee #

See? It worked. I can say it.

I can't even go... I can't even get my hair done.

You really want to be on the radio?

Only on the radio. It's just an act.

and listen to what it says.

Gather your things together, Robin. Let's go.

So... if you need more time or whatever...

Afternoon drive, the most powerful radio station in their chain,

I work here, so keep your mouth shut.

[Still lmitating Nixon] And I gave it to Robin over there.

No, he doesn't! I'm not in the movie!

OK. All right, That's rude. You go first.

Imus does it perfectly.

Absolutely. Robin's my anchor.

Yeah, go ahead. Tell me more about me.

I'll tell you that.

I don't need any more time.

[You Shook Me All Night Long Plays]

I work with your husband Kenny.

You have my word.

All right, let's go over to Dick Nixon, former president of the United States.

I'm not pathetic.

You talk too much.

Husband: Honey, this is not humiliating. This is show business.

I knew I was going to get in trouble if I did.

Could you come here for a second?

I was in Vietnam.

Let me ask you something.

# Callin' for mercy #

We're all rats trapped in a box,

You goddamn motherfuckers.

I am the hero of the lesbian community,

Robin... don't encourage him.

# We were makin' when you #

Al, I miss you so much.

Yo, Fartman. Love you, man.

# I don't believe in dying #

# Dee dee dee #

Howard: I was hired by an FM rock station, DC 101,

I say electrocute him. You gotta be with that program, huh, Ross?

I don't want to hear any more of this, you hear me?

Now watch and learn.

Marilyn Manson: # Your mouth is like a suicide #

You know what I want you to do for me,

This is the most beautiful you ever looked.

I didn't think anybody even listened to that.

and I've never been 21/2... What's the music?

Howard As God: Hello, Howard.

Let me tell you something. Look at yourself.

with a somewhat abnormal job. That I can accept.

Well, thank you, Gene. That's very nice of you.

What he did to me today

we are gathered here today

- OK. - Now hold this and say...

Give me a call. I'll help you out.

Irene... the weather girl.

OK, here we go.

Kill him until he is dead.

You know why I love you? 'Cause you're smart.

Are we talking about Brett again?

"How to Score with Babes,"

Well, I fucking worked my fucking ass off

I have a big cock.

every day till he was 14...

My sperm are fantastic. I'm fantastic.

I'm not real good at this, I confess,

OK, it's 5:35 at W N BC.

Make fun, not funny.

to a very, very charming and beautiful lady,

Hi, this is Howard Stern, and it's 75 degrees presently,

the only black traffic reporter in the Detroit area,

# I'm a tortured man #

Wait a second. If I do a lame show, it's never gonna take off.

Everything I do is misunderstood.

that runs around the country, you know, looking for work all the time.

# She was a fast machine #

You threw a grenade into a school?

[Aerosmith's Sweet Emotion Plays]

She has swallowed an entire 13-inch kielbasa.

So if we bring Robin back, you'll behave?

that's caused a bit of a shift in the listening patterns.

I don't mince words. You will never be a great disc jockey.

I absolutely am.

This is a great time to talk

I'm a bit of an old comedy man myself.

I deal with abnormality every single day.

How are his numbers?

am I not, Robin?

Howard did not tell me...

Well, for one thing, my clothes are gonna get all wet.

We didn't drive here for you to change your mind.

Roger, his rate...

Just real quick, OK? Listen.

They're the same thing.

Nat King Cole: # Pretend you're happy... #

Most common answer:

WCCC also wants to remind you

You gotta love it, don't you, Ross? Ho ho.

And they said if I do really well,

And you know what else you could do?

The guy's got 3 kids.

If you want to fire me, fire me. Go ahead.

Fuck ice chips, How!

Yes. You know, you might be right about that, Howard.

Bleah bleah bleah too much butter hey is that a nacho?

and next week we'll bring him to the zoo in a stroller."

I'd have to talk about everything. I couldn't hold back.

I'm not psychiatrist.

Mom, we're half negro?

I used to go to Stanley Sport all the time.

OK. I'll go get the door.

tight-sweatered...

and welcome to Match Game.

He's come all the way to our show for the first time.

All right. Let's get her out. Let's do it.

you know, uh, legendary.

This is a good discussion.

He was disgusting.

Screw the FCC. We just lost Muffler Man.

You be management... like me.

Oh, yes, I love it, baby. Give it to me.

Little cotton panties, a tight little undershirt.

We certainly do. We're very fortunate that way.

It's so apparent to me now what I should be doing.

and just see how he's feeling. You stay here. OK?

Because I'd be a schmuck.

It is disgusting. Take a look behind the fireplace.

Yes, Robin, he's running in right now.

"and the grand opening is this weekend.

Yes. Sir, may I help you?

I know I told you that I'd do it, but I don't want to.

I didn't make fun of the Chinese people, did I?

# And this not our fate... #

Harrison Ford...

- You're not gonna quit? - No.

I'm not even in this fucking movie!

I mean, I can't do it Saturday.

It is pronounced: W - aye - T!

Kill the white man.

from a 2.9 to a 5.6.

If we just give it a chance, if we just take some time with it,

right in front of you. Come on back.

to mold him into a proper kind of d.j.,

But my sperm is like supersperm,

Look at you, man.

What the hell are they doing?

Is that ri... Well, now, how about that, kiddies?

All right, all right, that's not going to work.

You can get her. You can get her.

She was incredibly beautiful. Really nice.

They're... they're driving you crazy.