Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

No. She said "made." That's past tense. There's a difference.

We've been dealing with all of this shit!

What are you doing? You want to get in? You wanna say hi to Lizzy?

nobody to come home to on the holidays

Good night, buddy.

What are they doing here?

But if you're afraid we can't handle knowing the bad stuff, or the scary stuff,

- No. Make sure she gets out to my truck. - Bye, Daddy.

We are going to adopt through foster care, just like you guys!

but our baby has to be our blood.

We've also been trying to conceive now.

You made such a good impression on us when we met you,

and you're gonna have a couple of lunch dates."

All right, everybody, I want you all to imagine

You guys want me to deal with this, or do you still got it?

Okay. Tuck in, everybody.

It's gonna be long and weird.

You wanna watch a little Fixer Upper?

Oh, I get it. My problems seem stupid now.

- Mom. Hey, kids. - Oh! Hi, honey!

- This is Carla. She's... - Their mom.

Who called it, huh? Who said it?

- You ready to meet three kids? - Three kids?

If she thinks our statement's the reason her mom doesn't get custody,

Relax. We'll get you there in one second, okay? You're...

Come in, look around.

Would not-her-parents do this?

- And what about preserving our family? - Yeah.

Now, you gotta step up and become the parents.

Good. Now can we just go inside so we can talk about this?

- Exactly. - Hell.

You wanna rotate like this, okay?

These are the kind of people who volunteer when it's not even a holiday.

You guys are doing good.

Absolutely no fundamentals whatsoever.

- Wassup, baby girl? - Nothing.

But if you're willing to love these kids who need a mom and dad,

Perfect. Let me go check in back, see what we have in stock.

That's... You suck!

Wow, that's a cute name. Jacob. I like... Like Jake.

We're not starving people here, okay? I have this under control.

I bought? You loved it too. And that's not even the point.

We see potential in things, we fix 'em up. Like they did.

If she's hostile with you again, maybe try using the three R's.

Because we... It was... I mean, I...

Wow, uh, it's, yeah, darkest of the black tones.

That's how your children feel every day of their lives.

So for a child to be removed, conditions have to be pretty bleak,

Do you happen to know anybody named Jacob

- Mmm! - Eeeew!

You want me to reheat it for you?

- Yeah. - Okay. Well, thank you. Bye-bye.

And if I were to put the kids in your care,

Here, take her. I think we'll get the point for us.

We're about to do something insane.

Lita, don't do what Lizzy said. What did you say? C uatro? "Go to your bedroom"?

- There's no fight. There's no trouble. - Let's get out of here.

who might be hanging around with our daughter, Lizzy Viara?

All right, so you guys gonna pick us up at 4:00?

Yeah, you too. Come on!

- Is Lizzy okay? - She's a little upset right now, buddy.

No? She doesn't like it? Why not?

Hey. Hey, baby.

- Hey, I'm so sorry about this. - Ellie, come on!

You're wearing that? Are you going to a strip club?

Really? That's how this works?

- What? Who is this person, Lizzy? - Open the door!

It doesn't need any more kids.

Guess what? We got a ride in a police car.

Don't forget, when Lizzy was ten her mother would disappear for weeks at a time,

Have a couple kids without the pregnancy and the hormones and the... the rage.

Well, we met your sister, and she's so awesome.

And people are gonna say some stupid shit.

- You did it on purpose! - What?

bounced around from placement to placement.

- Sure, yeah. Yeah, whatever, yeah. - Yeah?

- Yay! - That is so great.

We need your help with Juan and Lita.

Nothing has been decided yet.

The point is, when you are there, you let them get away with murder.

I don't care. I said no. That's not happening, okay?

God forbid we actually try to parent the little ones. No, no, that's her territory.

You did? Was that fun?

you put on a little less makeup than you do on the bad days.

And at that same occasion, did you tell Lizzy to call CPS and to come and take the kids?

- Yeah. - Awesome.

Good night, Mommy.

I don't know, I just thought when we met our kids

So I think the best thing is for you to adopt them.

- What? - I told you that wasn't me!

I think she's just trying to say that we needed a new challenge,

- Just not nearly enough. - Not nearly enough parents.

You ever play fricking Candy Land?

Give me the phone! Let go!

- You're driving me crazy! - Oh, my God. What are you doing?

I'm really thankful for that too.

They are not your real children.

- Yeah, the big guy, he's blessed us with so much. - Mm-hmm.

- To you? - Yeah!

Where's her mom now?

Speaking of which, next up we have October,

It's very unprofessional.

You couldn't have taken five seconds to let us know nobody murdered you?

We're gonna be all over your ass about your grades.

but you really love cheeseburgers.

- What are we doing here? - Let's go.

The janitor? The adult-ass janitor?

- Yeah. - Okay.

It was just a nice thought.