Tasty Mystery Baskets of Clips

I kind of like to give impromptu performances for our neighbors sometimes.

He's interested in Rachel.

You ain't lived till you've seen me in a cowboy hat.

No. I'm worried about you being inappropriate in my house.

when I blacked out a couple of times when I was their age?

So it's not being gay that upsets you. It's just me acting on it.

at what we witnessed yesterday at the assembly...

Uh-huh. All right, I'll see you then.

- Oh. - Yes. Uh, the kids want to sing a Ke$ ha song...

Those special effects at the assembly really paid off!

because of disinterest.

Why, just this week, we've had five suspensions...

I, for one, am never drinking again.

I don't get it. Drinking's never been a problem at this school.

Fine. I'm sorry.

But if it weren't for drinking, the assembly would have been a disaster.

Quiet, please. Quiet, please, children.

# You're the only one I can count on #

Most of the time, it was just to deal with Terri, but...

# I feel the earth move under my feet #

How about some Bloody Marys, y'all?

My dads, they left me alone in my house...

- # Don't you want me? # - # Don't you want me? #

# Blame it on the blue top Got you feelin' dizzy #

There's something I really, really want to say to you.

- Something else going on? - Let's see. Um...

# Need me a triple shot of that stuff #

# Wrapped right around my melon #

# Johnny, are you queer, boy? #

# Poppin' bottles in the Ice #

Here's what you missed. Quinn was dating Sam.

# If you lookin' like a model when them broke fellas holla #

Oh, that's amazing. She's got a girl crush on you.

Tell them I'll go if they go.

Santana, are you- Are you crying?

- I'm gonna break it down for you. - Okay.

I heard through the grapevine...

- I hope so. - All right, let's check it out.

- I didn't drink that much. - Are you kidding?

I mean, we're supposed to sing about the dangers of alcohol for this assembly.

From what I gather, something went down in the tent.

It felt good because you were drunk.

All right, buddy. I'm out of here. Don't get up.

No, you didn't.

Blaine was too drunk to drive, so I let him crash here.

I mean, even now, it-it- it's Alcohol Awareness Week...

I caught a whiff of hair spray and went full Linda Blair in the girls' bathroom.

and behold the awful price of alcoholism.

is the first of a long line of conflicted men that you will date...